It's Thursday

By Maddie
Goooooooooooooooooooood morning!!!!!!!

I’m sorry. I just faked that enthusiasm. I'm fairly sure that I have H1N1, also known as swine flu, and I can already tell it’s going to affect the tone of this post. For example, just as I was writing this, I realized that I was three minutes and 22 seconds into the song “He Loves You Not” by Dream. What it is doing on my iTunes is something I’d rather not discuss right now, but I think getting that far into the song without noticing I was listening to it shows what kind of state my life is in.


This is a Sad, Sad Song
Yup, this song is sad, but deal with it. Life is not always happy, I’m not always happy, and I’m not going to pretend I’m always happy just for you. Now, if any children are reading this, please stop, because I am about to get graphic. When I see Mick Jagger at 45 seconds in, I just want to jump his bones. Yeah, you heard me! Holy shit is he attractive! He is so sexy (I’m sorry, I hate the word as much as you do but feel it is the only accurate description) that I can look past his height, which is saying A LOT coming from someone as superficial as I am.

Great News
Also, some great news for all us Barely Legals: Ronnie Wood is dating a 20 year old!!! They’ve been dating for like a year now, but I just found out and am super excited about it. It has given me semi-hope in this bleak, bleak time, otherwise known as my day-to-day life.

Best Thing Ever
Now for the best thing I have ever seen in my entire life: A bear and a man truly being Best Friends. I mean, I honestly don’t even know how to process what I’m seeing. Aside from this disturbing picture of some sort of twisted version of a “late-night stroll,” the article has completely healed the wounds I had from watching Grizzly Man one too many times. The fact that the guy is married to Missi Pyle of Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay and Home Alone 4 fame somehow makes it even more delightful.

Actually, forget what I said earlier about not always being happy. As long as I know that somewhere, someway, a grizzly bear is eating dinner with men in ribbed turtlenecks, there is no reason to not have a smile on my face—even if I do have swine flu.


4 comments:

  1. I've heard that's not the only thing you've been faking...

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  2. Also, today sucks because I just discovered my favorite shirt that I'm wearing right now has a big hole in the right elbow and is forming one in the left.

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  3. That bear is going to eat that whole turkey. Bears are greedy.

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  4. I'm glad you finally admitted you're in the Barely Legal category of women but I am uncomfortable with any display of female sexuality.

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