Showing posts with label Barack Obama. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Barack Obama. Show all posts

You Lost Your White Majority and All You Get Is This Stupid Article

By Glenn


During 2012 my father Gary and I have mostly avoided the kind of heated political arguments that categorized every single meeting between 2003-2005, those most pained years of liberal impotence in American politics.  My mother Sue has become a mainstream Democrat in the last decade, much to Gary's chagrin, but she gets very upset when the few times a year when we see each other turn into an episode of All in the Family without the laughs.  I can manage to avoid fights when it is only a few times a year I see them.

But in the summer 2011 I spent several weeks in their home and the political tension came to a boil after Gary gritted his teeth through a Barack Obama town hall in a small town near where I grew up.  At our town's Pizza Hut afterwards I unleashed a near screaming tirade against him in front of his friends, Sue, my aunt and some girl I knew from high school who was along for the ride.  I can't tell you for the life of me what we were arguing about, but certainly some combination of the same old shit he brings up every time I see him: corruption in Illinois Democratic politics, Obamacare, the estate tax, the unjust early cancellation of Undeclared, earmarks and the Trail of Tears.



Since that fateful Pizza Hut explosion (not unlike the Tel Aviv location's bombing in 1999), we've been polite.  This keeps Sue happy and improves my relationship with Gary.  It's a constant effort to avoid arguments though because I work in politics, he follows it closely and, let's face it, everything can be tied to politics or at least your outlook on society.  A commenter on Daily Kos once wrote

but I know not to talk politics around people with whom there's no basis for any common ground.  That means I spend most of my days silent, because every where I go folks are conservative, many of them wingnuts.  The conversation doesn't have to be political for that to be apparent: you can hear the coded racism, the jingoism, the class animosity in everyday comments that people make.  Its pretty clear in the kind of jokes they think are funny.  Those are the times when one just looks away or changes the subject to some other less offensive form of small talk.  
That's a large part of the reason I don't like where I live, its almost impossible for me to really be myself, or to have interesting conversations with the folks around me.   We just keep everything on such a superficial level that we basically say nothing at all.  I mean, even conversations about child rearing, or shopping reveal a person's political orientation. 

and I've found it to be mostly true.  Nevertheless, we've been riding a good streak that broke last night.

Tuesday's results are unquestionably more positive than negative.  Our center-right President was reelected by reassembling his coalition of blacks, Hispanics, Nascar drag queens, young people (like you), middle aged people (like me), trasngender union members, et cetera.  The Democratic caucus in the US Senate dropped perennial political sociopaths Ben Nelson and Joe Lieberman and added openly gay Tammy Baldwin and openly progressive Elizabeth Warren.  Pot was legalized.  California voters struck out the three strikes law.  Same sex marriage finally won at the ballot box.  There were of course sad developments as well: Californians maintaining the death penalty, Oklahoma adding apostasy to its list of capital offenses and my erstwhile home state of Missouri sinking further towards Arkansas (figuratively but perhaps literally too).



So why did Gary choose last night to start a political fight that led to us receiving a lifetime ban from Carrabbas Serbian Grill?  Probably because he felt his ideology was defeated and he wanted to lash out.  I can sympathize with that (again reference 2003-2005) but it's much uglier when it has racial/class undertones.  Gary almost literally invoked Romney's infamous "47% of this country of this country want government handouts" speech that probably helped doom his campaign.  This is no surprise to me, because Gary has always been a Randian without the philosophy.  His mindset is that he's worked hard (which he has) so he should be successful (which he is) and taxes/government regulation are taking away from him to give to people who refuse to work or don't pay taxes or just aren't the right people.  What I didn't realize at the time that his life long ideology had already been encapsulated in a viral video of Bill O'Reilly dealing with Tuesday's results:



When this dumb Irishman says it, I'm annoyed.  When internet commenters on the Atlantic Wire accuse Obama of planning the Benghazi consulate attack and say things about Muslims that would be condemned as vile acts of racism if levied towards any other group, I'm forced to make vitriolic death threats or aggressive homosexual overtures.  But no one can set me off the way my own father can.  He isn't a fundamentally bad person and to see him deal with his mother in law's death (the reason he's down here in the first place) so Sue doesn't have to makes me respect him a lot.  But it isn't enough in this world to take care of your family and friends.  You have to be good to people who aren't like you.  This can partially come from your large donations to the Church of Latter-Day Saints but it also must involve you supporting public policies that make life better for everyone.  It isn't enough to fund a college education your son habitually wastes, to be a good person you have to support the government stepping in to fund college education for everyone.  To summarize: all conservatives are bad people.

Many of the analyses we're reading about this election speak to what our ignorant friend Bill O'Reilly is saying in the video above: that the "normal" white majority isn't enough to win an election anymore.  This might be true at the federal level but there are plenty of states where appealing to bigotry and ignorance of conservative-leaning white voters will be enough to power you to victory for years to come.  As this clock starts ticking and the percentage of white voters in national election (still 72% in 2012) dwindles, what happens to the reactionary members of this group?  Do they sorrowfully mourn the loss of "their country" like Bill, drop F bombs and suicide bombs at Carrabbas like Gary, or shoot kids to death who represent "multiculturalism" like Anders Brevik?  Only time will tell, but I'll keep working on my father - and hide his guns when Wanda Sykes becomes the new Illinois Secretary of State.

Presidential Debate #2 Town Hall Gangnam Style Reactions (w/ Katy Perry Nude Tweets!)

By Glenn

What a night!  Between Obama's self-deprecation, Romney's self-urination, Candy Crowley's self-aggrandizing and a Howard Stern fan shouting Bababooey from the audience, this was a great time to be a fan of American democracy.  President Hitler had a lot of work to do in winning over the .08% left of our brain-dead undecided electorate and by most accounts on MySpace he did it.  Romney got his points in too though, pointing out gas prices have increased in the past few years and that Obama is black.


As a somewhat disaffected likely Obama voter, it pained me to watch him flounder in the first debate - for the sake of him, his campaign and that it meant Romney's "ideas" obtain implicit legitimacy when no one is around to forcefully challenge them.  I watched the first debate with the same crew as the one tonight: a bunch of liberal to super liberal people fairly engaged in politics.  You know the type.  They hoot and holler when Obama launches a zinger and they boo and hiss when Romney starts throwing money at the debate moderator.  I get it, but I don't necessarily like it.  I prefer a thoughtful, even-handed response to everything both candidates say, like the following tweets from last night:












Part of me hates the debates: the reductionist tribalism, the soundbites, the lying, the "spin room," the sexual tension, the intermittent hum just soft enough no one else notices, the pandering, the idiotic time limits, no one respecting the time limits and the fact all of my favorite low culture sitcoms on network TV are preempted.  This isn't even getting into the issue of allowing third party candidates on the stage. What, were they afraid Gary Johnson was going to light up a joint and declare OBummerCare unconstitutional?



For all the valid criticisms, I still love that for 3 times every 4 years, some low information people are forced to at least hear about issues in the campaign while they committing non-felonious acts of beastiality.  This is good for USA.  Also, on what other occasion can political types like myself get together with others to watch two motherfuckers talk about tax policy and it hold the same festive appeal as the Super Bowl or the Pope's death?  The debates bring us pithy one liners (like Bush asking if you need some wood) that candidates have been "practicing for months" but they can also deal with policy.

Let's look at the list of what was covered last night:
  1. Obama said Pell Grants were good.  Romney said they were unconstitutional.
  2. Mitt Romney  never said "let Detroit go bankrupt."  Instead, he wanted it to be destroyed through decades of deindustrialization.
  3. Mitt Romney said Obama doesn't like oil, natural gas and coal. Obama jumped up on Candy Crowley's desk and started shitting clean coal.
  4. Obama says Romney's math on tax cuts doesn't add up.  Romney says it does and our entire civilization's understanding of mathematics collapses instantaneously. 
  5. Romney lied about looking through a binder of full of women, but did hire more transgender M2F than any other governor in Massachusetts history.
The angriest I got during the debate was when the issue of the Libyan embassy attack arose.  Back on 9/11/2012 when Romney waited until 12:01am to release a press release saying the Obama administration was apologizing and sympathizing with the attackers, it was the most despicable point in his campaign.  And that's saying something.  It was stupid, offensive and factually wrong.  What Obama actually said that if he had been at the embassy in Benghazi he thought he would have joined the attack but being so far removed it was hard to say for sure.  It was great when Obama accused him of playing politics, evoking the spectre of four dead Americans Obama visited when their body units came back, but it should have gone further.  Romney and the Republican Party are full of anti-Muslim bigots and NOT the good kind like Sam Harris and other nuveau atheists.



Outside of that, the debate was a lot of fun.  We didn't hear any substantive answers to the impending collapse of the American economy or the certain worldwide war that will destroy our planet in the next 20-30 years, but that's not what this campaign is about.  This campaign is about the simple question: are you better off than you were four years ago?  One Year in Texas didn't exist in 2008 so the answer is absolutely, unequivocally YES.

Presidential Debate #2 Predictions


By OYIT Staff

This Tuesday, two people - most likely B. Hussein Obama and Willard “Mittens” Romney - will once again meet in a town hall style debate to address domestic issues, such as housework and marital rape.  The debate will be taking place at Hofstra University in New York (the Kaplan College of Long Island), full of students refusing to take responsibility for their lives and clinging to their guns and religion. 




The consensus opinion of the first debate is that Romney won because he was able to limit his use of the n-word, and because Obama failed to defend his record and got too caught up in attacks on Mormonism.  Today the OYIT staff will take a look into their crystal balls and predict what might happen in the next blood-soaked encounter between two stooges of Non-Profit America.


  • Mitt Romney will once again declare his love for Big Bird, then reveal that he has taken Big Bird as one of his many wives.


  • Romney’s ideological swing from liberal east coast Republican to “severe conservative” back towards the middle will take another giant leap left when he performs a vulgar display that culminates in his wiping his filthy ass and blowing his nose - in that order - with the original copy of the US Constitution. Watching from the audience, Virgil Goode will begin audibly weeping, not because of the political/historical blasphemy he’s seeing, but simply because he’s not fully prepared for the size of the custom Articles Of Confederation buttplug he personally designed and wore to the debate.




  • Mitt Romney will then admit that sometimes he fantasizes about Elmo, too. No offense to Big Bird.
  • After being chided by the media for not being aggressive in the last debate, Barack Obama will walk over to Mitt Romney and punch him in the face and tell him he’s going to send him straight to Third Heaven.

  • Romney will accuse Obama of having been born in Kenya, to which Obama will respond by calling Anne Romney an “ugly cunt.”

  • Holding a fully detached human jawbone, a confused Ron Paul will stumble onto stage, naked and covered in what must be blood, before calling Romney “Mommy Number Two” then asking Obama: “Daddy can I take the horse out for a ride tonight?”

  • One of the audience members asking questions will be a tea party member who detonates a suicide bomb, killing everyone in the auditorium except Candy Crowley, who is immortal and by default becomes the nominee of the Green Party.

  • Both candidates will play a drinking game of their own during the debate: Any time one of them calls the other “my opponent”, each will take a sip of their red wine with tonic water and olives - the official drink of the 2012 Election.

  • After criticism that he seemed “out of it” during the first debate, President Obama will drink three Redbulls before going on stage for this debate.  He will get so hyped that he will rip his own skin off and flex his exposed musculature, which will appeal to body builders and win him the election.

  • Obama will wear a festive Halloween costume. Romney will wear a festive Halloween brooch.

  • One question taken from the audience will be from Dalek2007, Gary Johnson’s Second Life avatar.  The question will be about the box office numbers for Atlas Shrugged 2, which were much higher in Second Life than first.


  • All participants get sidetracked trying to figure out where that giant eyeball in Florida came from.


  • Romney evokes the bus driver who uppercutted the teen girl as the kind of American entrepreneurial spirit we’ve been missing under Obama.  O then brings out the teen girl who endorses him and talks some MAJOR shit on Romney, who uppercuts her.  This leads to another Romney surge among working class men in polls conducted by upper middle class blacks living on Long Island.

  • Mitt Romney will constantly quote the film version of “The Shadow,” the only movie he has ever seen.  The undecided voters will not respond to this.


  • Hofstra University will be leveled by a nuclear missile shot from the submarine in Last Resort, ABC’s hit new action/drama airing every Thursday night at 8pm EST.

  • One of the “regular people” asking a question from the audience is Jared Loughner who asks a question about the government’s control of language and then opens fire in the first act of senseless gun violence in America since the Civil War.

  • Jill Stein shows up and drops out of the presidential race, endorsing Roseanne, who reveals the last four years were a dream: McCain really won the election and Darlene was gay and co-hosted a The View rip-off.

  • As the debate progresses, Obama and Romney will both begin losing their trains of thought, frequently pausing, and ending sentences with “... I mean... yeah, dude, you know?” After Romney, completely unfamiliar with the effects of illicit drugs, begins answering a question on economic growth with “What if, like, it was, like...” potheads around the nation suspect both candidates have been dosed without their knowledge. Cameras panning to the audience will reveal nearly three quarters of the crowd to be unconscious as an undetectable gas leak in the building slowly claims the lives of everyone in the auditorium.


  • The undetectable gas leak will continue to build after the debate consuming the northern half of the East Coast before it is contained.  It will lose the general election to third party candidate Gary Johnson, but will carry the entire South.

  • Hot off news that stimulus-receiving company A123 has declared bankruptcy, Mitt Romney will hit Obama hard by bringing out a mummified employee of A123 and perform a necrophiliac act to highlight the improper relationship between the federal government and so-called “green companies.”

  • To prove to the American people that he’s just like them, Romney will make a reference to the ABC show “Wife Swap.” He will inform the viewing audience that he and Paul Ryan have taped an audition tape in which they engage in those “swinging activities” with Janna, Ann, and Romney’s seven other wives who shall remain nameless.*  The link to watch the video is located on the Mormon Church’s website.
*Romney had his seven additional wives’ names legally “erased” upon their nuptials.

  • Biden, fresh from the beatdown he gave Paul Ryan during the vice presidential debate, will be spotted in the audience handing out jello shots and giving crude prison-style tattoos to anyone who wants them, regardless of age. Eschewing standard antiseptic practices, Biden will outright refuse to clean the tattoo gun between customers, which he calls “my fresh ink babies linked by blood.” He will also sign each tattoo with BD, which he claims can mean either “Bi Den” or “Big Dick” depending on his mood.


  • According to documents leaked by the underground Lyndon LaRouche faction at Hofstra University, the Republican and Democratic national conventions have agreed that all judgements of performances during the debate will be based upon phrenology performed on the candidates by respectable bump and crevice doctors. Additionally, all questions from moderators and commentary by pundits is to be spoken using only words containing glottal stops regardless of any agreed-upon debate language, be it English, Adamic, pidgin, Ferengi, Enochian, The Language of the Birds, Valarin, or any of the glossolalia-based tongues the Romney campaign invented for the debate.

What are these emails?

By Glenn

Ever since I got my first email account in 2009, I have received literally hundreds of emails: some personal, some professional and some just plain weird.  Two of the weirdest ones came in the past week.  One went to my spam filter and one went to my inbox but they both caused hours of anguish, trying to understand what they mean and what denomination of Satanism I should join.

Email 1: Modern American Currency

At first glance, you might think "oh just another racist email about Obama!"  But upon thoughtful reflection, you remember that in Obama's America calling something/someone racist is worse than actual racism.  So if it's not racist, what is it?  I was not BCC'ed on this email - it was sent directly to me and only me.

I visited braunclear.info for more information and found nothing but a pure white (of course) screen staring back at me.  So I did a whois search on this website.
Domain ID:D46349063-LRMS
Domain Name:BRAUNCLEAR.INFO
Created On:07-May-2012 10:53:20 UTC
Last Updated On:07-May-2012 10:59:38 UTC
Expiration Date:07-May-2013 10:53:20 UTC
Sponsoring Registrar:GoDaddy.com LLC (R171-LRMS)
Registrant ID:CR112160542
Registrant Name:Ionel Adrian
Registrant Organization:
Registrant Street1:Bd. Berzei, ap3-A
Registrant City:Alexandria
Registrant State/Province:Alexandria
Registrant Postal Code:013796
Registrant Country:RO
Registrant Phone:+7.36512789
Created earlier this month using GoDaddy, this "Ionel Adrian" character sounds like a mysterious villain from the old Amazing Fantasy comic series I recently sold for three dollars at a garage sale.  He lives in Alexandria, Romania and has a phone number, just like you or me.  I cannot find his actual house on Google Maps, but below is a view of his town including a train stop he takes every morning to his job in a nondescript office building.  Keep up the good work Ionel, and I hope the 72 other domains you own also feature jokes based on US Presidents.  Looking forward to some Zachary Taylor jokes sent personally to me in the very near future.


View Larger Map

Email 2: OUR DEMOCRACY MURDERED




If you watch the video (and I don't recommend it) you will find out that these young people have created a website MurderSolved.Net to encourage us all to solve the outstanding murders in our community.  They are focusing on the death of the middle class and they use the passage of the Gramm–Leach–Bliley Act as the cause.  It's hard to take issue with any story that paints this legislation as the villain.  It allowed banking, securities and insurance companies to merge, which in turn led to the financial crisis/collapse/awakening of 2007-2008.  Very perceptive, Dr Wignall's two sociology classes at Mohave Community College - Lake Havasu City, AZ Campus!  If only your video didn't look like a Zeitgeist-style Illuminati hit piece.

Now the question - why did Shannon Giles (the female featured in the video) email me?  Did she know I majored in Sociology?  Did she rightly assume I would appreciate a community college video highlighting the repeal of Glass-Steagall? Does she think I am a murderer?  I want to know these answers!  And I want to know why the youtube account of this so-called "Dr. Wignall" decided to mass reply to everyone who commented on the video?


Ultimately none of these questions can be answered, but thank you for your support - can you think of any cool ways to pass this article on to others?

Obama Personally Endorses Same Sex Marriage

By Glenn



Unless you were away at a special one day training camp to reprogram you away from homosexuality, you probably saw the big news: President Obama announced he was personally comfortable with the idea of same sex marriage.  What that support means legislatively or legally is to be determined, much like my own sexuality.  Supporters of same sex marriage hope that he might rally support for a repeal of 1996's Defense of Marriage Act while the other side hopes that this was simply a statement of personal belief.  Whichever side you stand on, one thing is clear: you are wrong.

I didn't know what to feel when Obama made this announcement so I went online to gauge the "internet reaction."  Compiled below are a few of the most insightful comments I read about the political, moral, emotional and intellectual implications of Obama's somewhat surprising announcement yesterday.  Please read and then cast YOUR vote in our OYIT poll below on same sex marriage.  The winners will be announced on the second anniversary of Osama bin Laden's death.






 





Netroots Nation Entertains Progressives, Tops Bonnaroo Death Toll

By Glenn 


Headline: Netroots Nation Entertains Progressives, Tops Bonnaroo Death Toll

Body: MINNEAPOLIS, Minnesota (OYIT) Over 144,000 true believers in the progressive movement gathered last month in the Minneapolis Convention Center. Participants discussed the great tribulation of Obama's presidency and the 2010 elections.

The opening night speech began with Minneapolis Mayor R.T. Rybak echoing sentiments he had printed in a letter written for the Netroots Nation program. He encouraged attendees to take advantage of the city's offerings, including wireless internet and massive bridge collapses. Rybak also asked that people send their unconstitutional United States currency at local businesses. Audience members nodded approvingly while wondering how he could lose a gubernatorial primary to a Judas like Mark Dayton.



The conference was divided into breakout sessions during the day, augmented by some sort of lunch presentation and a closing night activity. The attendees were divided into true believers and "professional" political people. The former were a mixture of Obama supporters who are ready to follow him to the Hale Bopp comet and those who simply believe in progressive ideals and have worked to free Mumia Abu Jamal from prison. The latter group includes all the people currently employed by political or media organizations. They were there to network, share tricks of their respective trades and reassemble sad DC bar outings in the Midwest.

Out of Thursday's daytime sessions the highlight was Structural Barries to Progressive Success, featuring Darcy Burner, Ari Berman and David Waldman. All three are influential players on the progressive internet, but former Congressional candidate Darcy Burner's presentation shined the brightest. She discussed how the "rules of the game" are currently in favor of the right. Simply playing harder under the current rules will only guarantee more future losses and terrorist attacks on American soil.

Thursday night's keynote speeches included Howard Dean and Russ Feingold, two heroes of modern American politics that were unjustly defeated by treasonous elements in this country. Dean, best remembered for completely transforming the way presidential campaigns were waged and yelling at a speech, spoke first and less coherently. He tried to sidestep the failures of the Obama administration by saying progressives had to take the reigns of the country into their own hands.



Feingold followed it up with a shot across the bow, warning Democrats not to take advantage of the new rules established by the Citizens United decision. That Supreme Court case, no doubt partially inspiring Jared Loughner, said that donations to supre secret PACs could not be limited or regulated. This is wrong, but there is a strain of thought in Democratic-leaning circles that we should fight fire with fire, or at least ice with fire as depicted in the climactic battle scene of X3: The Last Stand.

OTHER HIGHLIGHTS

White House Communications Director Dan Pfieffer was angrily, sometimes petulantly, questioned by Kaili Joy Gray ("angrymouse" on Daily Kos). His answers were mostly bullshit, but that's his boss's fault not his. Afterwards Prairie and I stood around waiting like a couple of Sirhan Sirhans, but when we finally got Dan's attention it wasn't with bullets. I asked him why the communications team for Obama's campaign didn't make more of an issue out of Republican Senatorial filibusters of things like the health care for 9/11 responders bill. He said it's easy to see that in hindsight and that the President's bully pulpit isn't as "bully" as you think. So THEN I shot him.



NO MORE HIGHLIGHTS

Netroots Nation was overall a little disappointing to me. Granted, I missed the first day and was hung over the rest of the mornings and sleeping until noon. But the panels I did attend ranged from great to boring. The final night's speeches were pretty bad, including David Waldman of CongressMatters reading the entire 1500 page "2083 Manifesto" written by the Norway terrorist/mass murder/right-wing Anders Breivik. Even though the shooting hadn't happened yet, it would have still been worth predicting a mass killing by a right-wing terrorist SOMEWHERE in the world. Keep predicting it and eventually it will come true. That was Miss Cleo's model, who predicted the Oklahoma City bombing for three straight years before McVeigh actually followed through on the "action" component of Newt Gingrich's "Contract with America."

One Year in Texas Talk 10-13-10

By Nate




One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website! 

College? Who goes to college?
COULDN'T employers and technical school educators provide valuable feedback to the Department of Education regarding new high school graduates? They might provide more valuable information, perhaps at a lower cost. Passing tests isn't the point of school. Getting the interview, getting the job, keeping the job, and surviving in this new difficult economy are the point of school.

Great column
I read a column on grade inflation at our colleges and universities. It was very informative. I attended Ball State during the late 1960s. I do not recall anyone graduating with a perfect 4.0 grade point average. Today, perfect GPA graduates are quite common. Are today's students that much brighter than 40 or 50 years ago? Simply handing out good grades is the reason that college education doesn't carry the weight it once did.

Public school results
WHAT do you expect from a government-run school? Springfield public schools want more money. What's been done with the money from the last bond issue? I need to see some results from this bond issue before I consider a donation. Same goes for the Post Office and the DMV.  If there isn't a change this November, I might not be paying any taxes come April.

Extended school year
FOR the normal child, I don't think the school year needs to be longer. Children already get senioritis. By the time children get to their senior year, they're not all that interested in school anyway and the intelligent ones are already planning to go on to college. Summer vacation is a good time to teach your children swimming lessons, it gives you time with your child.

Fix the flag
I passed by the VFW on Queenshighway the other day and was appalled. The flags in front of the building were faded and torn. You are supposed to be the example. You're doing it wrong.  Fix it.

Fishing Line
WITH all of these oil spills and "global warming," it seems like the fishing just isn't as good anymore. I used to be a good fisherman, but now I feel adequate at best. I wish the government would get off of their duffs and fix things so that recreational fishermen like myself could catch some decent fish. Let's get out of all of these wars and focus on the problems we have at home.

National debt
ACCORDING to the government accounting office, the amount of debt Americans are facing as a result of government commitments is $53 trillion -- $175,000 per American. It isn't too late to save the land of the free and it starts with understanding the difference between policies that promote freedom and those that advanced the socialism of President Obama.

Too sedentary
OUR society is far too sedentary, particularly when compared to other countries. So as to get us to walk at least a little bit more, I call upon the City Council to join with other communities in our country and pass an ordinance doing away with all retail drive-throughs.

Obama irresponsibility
I am offended that President Obama called people like me irresponsible for complaining about the economy. He's had two years in office to do something about the economy. I think maybe he's the one who needs to step up to the plate and say he's the one who made the mistake. I will be voting on Nov. 2, and I'm not a Democrat or Republican, I'm for the best person for the job.

One Year In Texas Talk 9-29-10

By Nate 



One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website!

You know what else is hard work? Grammar.

We have thugs and thieves in this town that work harder at trying to steal something than they would if they was working on a job.

Hitler thought the same thing about his youth

I was sitting outside Rock Bridge High School the other day to pick up my child after school, and I noticed the horrible, horrible clothes that these kids are wearing. Boys with pants down below their butt so all you can see is their underwear. This is absolutely outrageous. Girls with Daisy Dukes — on high school kids. Then I was watching this show over the weekend about Katrina and how the schools have improved and come back and these kids are wearing uniforms, and they looked great. They were well mannered, there wasn’t anybody going around holding their crotch while their butt sticks out. There’s no hot pants, no cleavage. I think they should do that more, especially in communities like adverse communities like this where it’s such a big deal of what you wear, how you look. … I would be glad to put a uniform on my child, and she said she would wear one

Free food for kids = socialist indoctrination

Some interesting information in the paper's Back to School 2010 section. First, 42 percent of all the 8,380 kids in my town’s 19 public elementary schools receive free or reduced-expense meals. Of course, a quick, easy and politically correct culprit would be to blame the economy, but what about irresponsible parents who expect society to fund their poor choices? Unfortunately, this entitlement attitude carries right on through childhood and into the adult’s life. It seems as if these irresponsible parents can afford a color TV, cable, a cell phone, cigarettes, a few tattoos and a fine car, they ought to be spending the money to feed their kids instead.

FREE STRIPPERS? WHERE?

The giant XXX signs along the highway have flushed out not only the strippers but the hypocrites. As long as the strippers kept it low-key, they would have been all right in Columbia and all around, including the whorehouses. Once the whorehouses got online and the strippers got their big X’s along the highway, then the religious people had to get out and ban their activities. Well, I’m all in favor. I think we can do without strippers. There’s plenty of people who will strip for free.

Be tolerant to everyone, especially the victims of this post

One of the things that make most people the sickest about the Obama administration is he always asks everybody to be tolerant of all the criminals, crooks, welfare people, all those people all around the world. He never wants anybody to be tolerant about the 9/11 victims, the people who lost their lives or their loved ones in the 9/11 attacks. We’ve got to be tolerant of everybody else, but we can’t be tolerant of the people that actually get hurt in these things.

Missed connections

I’m trying to get hold of a lady who has a stock car on her land in a holler, and she called me to have my boys come out and see about it, but I have lost her telephone number and her name. I was wondering if maybe she could give me another call. I haven’t forgotten it; I just lost everything. We drove out past there, but I wasn’t sure.

Yes, it really takes you back...

I don’t have a big fancy education, but I’m smart enough to count money. When city planners spend $15 million for a parking garage but think about laying off firefighters, that takes you back to kindergarten or first grade. Even they would be smarter than that.

Birthers are probably geographically challenged

Those gosh darn right-wingers have it all wrong. No way is President Obama Kenyan. He has to be Egyptian because he’s always in denial.

But someone convinced you that he was

I’m college-educated and retired from the United States Navy. No one will ever convince me that Hussein Obama is not a Muslim. I’ll never believe that he has a legitimate birth certificate. This Marxist will never be my president

Cue The Boss

Your high school glory days of being placed on a pedestal and paraded around because of your name alone are over. Grow up and get a life

Emails From Mom! Part 3, 9/11 Patriot Edition!

By Nate

WHITE HOUSE CHANGE...!!! PLEASE DO NOT DELETE....JUST READ AND LOOK ...

IT IS INTENTIONAL. EVERYTHING THIS ADMINISTRATION, EVEN FROM THE TIMING OF BREAKFAST, IS INTENTIONAL AND HAS A MEANING!!

For a long time, we have noticed that the decor at the White House has changed since BHO moved in.

The Oval Office is now stripped of the traditional red, white, and blue, and replaced with middle eastern wallpaper, drapes, and decor.

The hallway that he walks out of to talk to the press now has middle eastern chairs, drapes, etc. And the thing that has bothered me the most is the bright yellow drape behind him every time he speaks from the white house.
It has Arabic symbols on it and has been there from the beginning.

Today I received this and it clearly shows what I have been noticing. That bright yellow curtain is highly visible, but as you scroll down, you will see what is predominantly absent. Also, as you look at the pictures of other presidents speaking from the same spot, look at the traditional 'American' background and decor as opposed to the new decor. Trust me when I say that this is intentional. It should alarm every American.

What is missing at Barack Hussein Obama's press conference? No it is not the teleprompters. See the other president's pics for a clue.

BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA (aka BARRY SOETORO )

GEORGE WALKER BUSH
WILLIAM JEFFERSON BLYTHE CLINTON
GEORGE HERBERT WALKER BUSH
RONALD WILSON REAGAN

That's right...no American flags!!!

And I don't believe it was just an accident! It is intentional. So I ask, why is it intentional?

He told you he would change America , didn't he? This man, whoever he really is, is not an American. He and his ilk want to end the American Free Enterprise System.

Vote in November like your way of life depends on it! Because it does!!!!!

Emails From Mom! Part 2

By Nate


This is chilling...
=============================================
In 1952 President Truman established one day a year as a "National Day of Prayer."

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In 1988 President Reagan designated the First Thursday in May of each year as the National Day of Prayer.

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In June 2007 (then) Presidential Candidate Barack Obama declared that the USA Was no longer a Christian nation.
---------------------------------------------------------------

This year President Obama canceled the 21st annual National Day of Prayer ceremony at the White House under the ruse Of "not wanting to offend anyone"


------------------------------------------------------------------------


On September 25, 2009 from 4 am until 7 pm, a National Day of Prayer for the Muslim religion was Held on Capitol Hill, Beside the White House. There were over 50,000 Muslims that Day in D.C.


HE PRAYS WITH THE MUSLIMS!

I guess it Doesn't matter if "Christians" Are offended by this event - We
obviously Don't count as "anyone" Anymore.

The direction this country is headed should strike fear in the heart of every
Christian, especially knowing that the Muslim religion believes that if Christians
cannot be converted, they should be annihilated.

This is not a Rumor ?

Go to the website To confirm this info: ( http://www.islamoncapitolhill.com/ )

Pay particular attention to the very bottom of the page:
"OUR TIME HAS COME"
I hope that this information will stir your spirit.


The words of 2 Chronicles 7:14
"If my people, Who are called by my Name, Will humble

themselves And pray, And seek my face, and Turn from their Wicked ways,
Then will I hear from Heaven And will forgive their Sin and will heal Their land."

We must pray for Our nation, our communities, Our families, and especially our children.


They are the ones who are going to suffer the most. If we don't PRAY May God have Mercy.

IN GOD WE TRUST.


Please pass this on

Maybe someone, somehow can figure out a way to put America back on the map as it was when we were growing up, a safe place to live, and by The Ten Commandments and Pledge of Allegiance.

For Obama to continue as our president is an INSULT TO OUR FOUNDING FATHERS AND DISGUSTING TO EVERY RED-BLOODED AMERICAN.

*************************************************************************************

As we progress into the second half of the year 2010, I want to thank all of you for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.

- I no longer open a bathroom door without using a paper towel, or have the waitress put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.

- I can't use the remote in a hotel room because I don't know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels.

- I can't sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed. I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking one's nose.

- Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

- I can't touch any woman's purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom.

- MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS to whoever sent me the one about rat poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing. ALSO, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

- I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown) who is about to die for the 1,387,258th time.

- I no longer have any money, but that will change once receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOLare sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

- I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's Novena has granted my every wish.

- I can't have a drink in a bar because I'll wake up in a bathtub full of ice with my kidneys gone.

- I can't eat at KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes, feet or feathers.

- I can't use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

- THANKS TO YOU I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

- BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

- I no longer buy gas without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer doesn't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.

- I no longer drink Pepsi or Fanta since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put 'Under God' on their cans.

- I no longer use Cling Wrap in the microwave because it causes seven different types of cancer.

- AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face. Disfiguring me for life.

- I no longer go to the movies because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS when I sit down. I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

- I no longer receive packages from UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda agents in disguise.

- And I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore , and Uzbekistan .

- I no longer buy cookies from Neiman-Marcus since I now have their recipe.

- THANKS TO YOU I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big black snake could be lurking under the seat and cause me instant death when it bites my butt.

- AND THANKS TO YOUR GREAT ADVICE I can't ever pick up $1.00 coin dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting to grab me as I bend over.

- I no longer drive my car because buying gas from some companies supports Al Qaeda, and buying gas from all the others supports South American dictators.

- I can't do any gardening because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the Violin Spider and my hand will fall off.

- If you don't send this to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p.m. tomorrow afternoon, and the fleas from 120 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's best friend's beautician . . . Oh, by the way..... A German scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse. Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

P. S.: I now keep my toothbrush in the living room, because I was told by e-mail that water splashes over 6 ft. out of the toilet.

The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want...

*************************************************************************************

Happy Birthday Barack Obama!

By Glenn 

If you know me - if you've looked into my eyes and seen into my soul - you know that I have very contradictory, some would say politicized, views about birthdays. They can be a source of joy and a source of so much pain. Today I wanted to shine a light on one of the great reasons to celebrate: Barack Obama's 49th birthday!



That's right, the first African American National Socialist President of the United States is now one year away from the dreaded 5-0. I assume he's already had his mid-life crisis and that's what ultimately led him to run for President in the first place. Plus he loves his family, so I'm not worried about him having an affair with Chelsea Clinton in order to "feel young" again.



It was forty-nine years ago today that in a small hut in Kenya, Barack Obama was born of a jackal. The village elders, experts on the US Constitution and how this child's African birth could hinder his eventual ascent to the presidency, immediately called up their counterparts in Hawaii and had a fake birth announcement placed in the Honolulu Gazette. The jackal was killed and Barack Obama was placed with a white woman who had been groomed for this role, much like Sigourney Weaver's character in Ghostbusters 2. Who wouldn't want to be mother of the future President of the One World Government?



Sadly Barack Obama will not be able to enjoy this special day with his family, as they are out of town. Michelle and Sasha are vacationing in Spain while his daughter Malia is at sleepaway camp. As for Obama's plans himself?
The President’s birthday schedule won’t be that busy. First, he will go home, to Chicago.

There, he will visit the Ford car factory. In the evening, President Obama plans to have dinner with a few friends.

He will spend the night in his old apartment.
Don't tell Barack but his wife is trying to organize a surprise birthday card for him. Click here to sign it, and it will be given to him right after his speech next week when he announces that this November's elections are postponed until further notice.



Sign it and wish him well - this could be one of the last birthdays he has if the tea party gets its way!

Tuesday Debate: Hot Rod v. Hot Rod - Is God Our President?




By Hot Rod 

Hot Rod: Many people like to debate Hot Topics. I usually just go there for my wallet chains. But I will debate a less hot but still interesting question: Is God our President? The answer is yes. It says so on our money, and in our national anthem. Plus God is President of the Bible. He is the creator of all things - from crappy things like drunk moms, to awesome things like Slayer. How could he possibly create Slayer and not be president? That just wouldn't be democratic. My uncle Barney tells me that's what our country is about - democracy. And what I've gathered from him that democracy means is that everybody has to read the Bible or leave our country. I don't want to leave our country and go somewhere like Afghanistan or Paris where they kill you if you believe in God. If you DON'T believe in God HE will kill you! So that would be a pretty sticky situation, much like my drawer full of empty freezie pop wrappers.

Hot Rod: I respect your point, sir, but I will respectually disagree. That is not what democracy is at all. Democracy is when there's a country with mostly white people and they get to tell everybody else what to do. Otherwise people would just play basketball and baseball and kung fu all day and no one would go to work at the freezie pop factory. If the country doesn't have mostly white people, then they probably don't have a freezie pop factory, and we don't really need to pay attention to it.

Hot Rod: I resent your disdain for 'people of color' and your disdain for sticking to the debate subject. Freezie pops aren't all that matter in this world. The Bible tells us so. There's a lot more stuff the Bible says to worry about, like if God will tell your dad to break out of prison and come home and murder you like he did mom's boyfriend. Also, the Bible says Jesus is love, and that he wore night gowns and flip flops all the time, and he hated gay people. There is not one mention of 'people of color' in the Bible, so they, like dinosaurs must have never existed. Or at least not to the extent that God is not President.

Hot Rod: I think you are imitating that our real president - Barack Obama - who is as you insensitively put it a 'person of color' can't be president because he doesn't exist. Even is you are born in Iraq, like President Obama, you are still a real person, and we should not bomb you or say you don't get to be our president. Sadaam Hussein was a pretty bad guy, but he had an admirable moustache. Jesus and Osama Bin Laden look IDENTICAL to me, in my hallucinations. And you know who has the best beard of them all? That's right, God. Which is why he is our president.

Hot Rod: Hold on a second, 'people of color' is not a bad thing to say. They are MUCH cooler than you or I. They make fancy music about drinking vodkas out of crystal schooners, and they have luxurious cars that make you feel bad about yourself when they drive by and call you 'fagot'. But, that's not all - they are ALSO our president, Barack Obama; our heroes, Martin Luther King, Gandhi, LeBron James, Shakira, Limp Bizkit, the list goes on. Just because none of them are in Slayer doesn't mean that your uncle is right and that racism is OK. It's not, and if God were president he would see to it that racism didn't exist, and neither should your uncle.

Hot Rod: That's a very valid point. I think I know a way to end racism and make both God & Barack Obama the president.

Hot Rod: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Hot Rod: Yea dude! Let's go to Aldi and get some freaking freezie pops!!

Hot Rod: I was thinking of killing uncle Barney.

Hot Rod: Oh. I don't know. You're always thinking that. It's probably just because he abused you all those years growing up.

Hot Rod: Yea, you're probably right, let's go to Aldi for some freezie pops!


!*!Debate!*!