Showing posts with label mark-paul gosselaar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mark-paul gosselaar. Show all posts

One Week in Entertainment with Glenn

By Glenn 

This has been one of the most exciting weeks in entertainment, if you count the World Cup as "entertainment." I know I was entertained - more entertained - by it than I was the newest happenings with Kendra or Bill Pullman. They were married to each other this week and Kendra will star as Vivica Fox's character in the remake of Independence Day coming out in summer 2011.

Mel Gibson and his ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva are fighting over their baby daughter. I thought it was about custody but it turned out to be about whether to raise her as an anti-semite.

Mark-Paul Gosselaar, of Saved by the Bell and NYPD Blue fame, is filing for divorce from his wife. I was shocked to find out the wife isn't Tiffany Amber Theissen! It's Lark Vorhees, daughter of Jason Vorhees.

Kendra, the only mentally retarded person to have her own show on E!, is celebrating her one year wedding anniversary. Her gift registry is available on Toys 'r' Us's website.

Britney Spears and Kevin Federline both ended up in the same place for their son's preschool graduation. I think it's really sweet that they can put aside their differences for the sake of their young child. There's no joke to tell here.

Finally, and most interestingly, Landon Donovan the American soccer hero from this week's game against Algeria might be reconciling with his wife. It's too early to say if it's because of his winning goal and much too early to say if it will take another US victory for them to fully reconcile, but if you needed another reason you root for America, there it is. AMERICA PLEASE WIN THE WORLD CUP TODAY!

Good Morning Divorcés

By Keelin 




Sigh. Oh, good morning. I guess.

I apologize in advance if this good morning is only an adequate one. I'm not my usual jubilant self ever since my two favorite quasi-celebrity couples decided to jettison 54 combined years of marriage for what I can only imagine will be years of debauchery and carnal waywardness. (If country music is to be believed, though, Jesus is at the end of that path of sin -- like, to save you from it, not to participate in it.)


On Tuesday, Al and Tipper Gore, the Captain and Tennille of political life, announced they were divorcing after 40 years of marriage. Then yesterday, famed "Saved by the Bell" thespian Mark-Paul Gosselaar said he and his wife, some lady, are breaking up too! (Actually, I read on reliable gossip websites that her name is Lisa Ann Something -- I assume they bonded over the fact that they both have two first names. Apparently, that's only enough for 14 years of matrimonial bliss.) I haven't been this heartbroken since I found out Robert Pattinson is dating all of the Jonas Brothers.


Today's Weather




Rain, endless rain that poetically conveys my inner turmoil over the state of America's celebrity marriages. Can't any of my favorite couples stay together? Tiger and Elin Woods? Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head? Anyone?

Today's Movie



"The Gay Divorcée" is a film from a more wholesome time, when people settled their differences with ballroom dance and women were still getting used to this "voting" thing. Don't be confused by the title: this movie was made before the homosexual lobby stole the word "gay" from innocent Americans who were simply cheerful.

Today's Prediction




Al Gore will try internet dating under the Sarah Palin-inspired moniker ExtremeGreenie101. Meanwhile, Zack Morris and Kelly Kapowski will re-unite on the Hawaiian beach immortalized in the "Saved by the Bell" TV movie. And everyone will be happy again.