Good Morning from North Dakota

By Glenn

Good morning. This is the first post I've written since I drove 12 hours north into the great state of North Dakota. The only major difference I can tell living here versus Missouri, Illinois, DC, etc. is that people speak with thick Scandinavian accents here and are very nice. For instance, when I was walking around someone said "hi" to me and then later at the grocery store someone said "Did you find everything all right?" That's what they call "Minnesota nice." The sun also doesn't set until 10pm, which lets me get a lot of lawn mowing done. That's my job here - a professional lawnmower!

today's Weather

It's going to be beautiful in North Dakota. Since it's so close to Canada it's not very hot in the summer, which is perfect because that's what season it is right now. It doesn't snow and when it's sunny it's sunny until 10pm. All the farting from the bison creates a layer of our atmosphere that traps the sun's rays and creates global warming. If you live anywhere closer to the Equator, I pity you. These next tow months will be the hottest of your fucking lives. Meanwhile I'll be snowboarding down George Washington's face on Mount Rushmore. I know that's South Dakota, but close enough.

Today's New Senator

This should have been addressed already but let me atone for the slight: Al Franken is the newest US Senator from the great neighboring state of Minnesota. Though he won the election last November, the RNC/Norm Coleman/Tim Pawlenty held him hostage, not unlike the SLF did to Patty Hearst. They made the Minnesota Supreme Court rule 5-0 that Norm Coleman's challenge was bogus and now Minnesota has two Senators! A MN-based paper distributed here had an ecstatic headline yesterday morning. You see, when the Constitution promises a state that it gets two Senators and then the Republican Party tries to only make them have one, there are some hard feelings. In honor of Al...

Today's Video

I love this so much. I remember the weekend it was on CSPAN's Book TV, though it must have been almost ten years ago. This was at the point of my life where I used to tape all of Al Franken's appearances on TV, starting with this one. This was also the point where he came to my college to speak and I protested outside with the College Republicans. You might say "Glenn that doesn't make any sense!" But it never made sense for them to protest him either. Sometimes you just gotta protest.

Today's Picture

This is a bison. That's what I ride to work every day. And it's who I pay to mow my lawn, because after a long day of mowing other people's, I have no desire to do my own. Have a good day!


  1. hollllly shit, that bison looks PI$$ED. he must love you so much to allow you to ride on his back. i wish i could that watch al vs. bill o video so much right now.

  2. You pay a Bison to mow your lawn!? He's just going to spend all that money on drugs!

  3. At least Franken didn't convert to the RNC or get shot by Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner while he was held hostage!