Good Morning from OYIT [Final Edition?]

By Jake

OYIT is going through some changes. We are losing writers and hopefully gaining some (although that is probably doubtful). Glenn and myself have decided to scale back on the number of articles we are going to write. This essentially means Glenn has give up on Good Morning from OYIT. I could write it every day, but nobody really reads it and I'd rather spend my time writing TV Show Ideas or some other trivial shit nobody reads, but at least I enjoy writing that stuff.

If one of you out there wants to tackle the Good Morning article, then we would welcome it with arms wide open, like that douche from Creed. It is a really easy article to write, really. Like I said, I would do it, but I don't want to flood the site with my articles that nobody reads. Heather is the most popular person on the site, so in theory she should take it over. We'll see.

Let's not dwell on this, instead let's take do one last (hopefully not the last, but probably will be) "of the day" for old times sake.

Hair Dryer of the Day
When your hair is wet nothing dries it like a Conair hair dryer. Conair is the the only name that is universally trusted when it comes to ridding hair of over saturation with water. Men and women both love this superior product, and with good reason, it's the fucking best period. If anybody leaves a comment arguing otherwise I will quit OYIT and go write exclusively for the Conair blog. Fun fact: Con Air the movie has nothing to do with Conair the hair dryer, but they are both great.

Thank you and good morning. Remember if you want to write this article, please email me at


  1. I used the Conair to roast human flesh when I was in that plane crash in the Andes Mountains. You may remember this as portrayed in the 1993 film Alive.

    They won't let me use that testimonial on their blog.

  2. Why is glenn such a quitter?! I will miss the good morning posts!

  3. Heh. I would rather wake up extremely hungover w/crazy shits than take over this column.

  4. 2/24/09 - OYIT starts its slow decline.

  5. 2/25/09: OYIT rises from the murky waters to stomp Tokyo into dust. The citizens run in fear.

  6. 2/26/09 - all writers killed in a freak accident.
    3/2/09 - new cybernetic versions of all writers built to completion and take over control of the site.

  7. was this truly the last good morning post? and are we all robots?

  8. I don't think this is the last one. I think Keelin talked us into bringing it back.