Wake up! It's a Tuesday morning. No time left to say goodbye.

By Glenn 

Greetings. In today's good morning post, we'll cover Neil Young's lost album Time Fades Away, gym etiquette, my new bluetooth and the weather. Do you ever have a moment in your day to day life when you're driving your car down the road and you think about what it would be like to drive off a bridge or into a median? If you do, you need to go see what we call a "therapist" or "counselor." These feelings are not healthy, and no amount of good morning posts are going to fix whatever deep seated problem that's causing you to fantasize about a violent, automobile-based death. I talked to someone recently about what it would take to become a counselor, but I realize now that I already am. You are in a chair as you read this but you might as well be on the proverbial therapist's couch.

[I genuinely think if I didn't work in politics I would want to be a counselor of some sort. I like to help people with their problems because I don't have any myself.]

Today's Weather
I know when you wake up it's dark and it feels cold, but it's not as bad as you imagine. For example, today our high was 18 degrees. It may not sound like much, but it's important to acknowledge and embrace the small victories in your day to day life. Last week I don't think it got above zero degrees, even during high noon. Now I can walk outside in a hooded sweatshirt and a corduroy jacket with no gloves or hat. Do I get cold quickly? Sure, but I've decided that I'm not going to let the weather or my parents dictate my life.

Today's Lost Neil Young Album

Are you familiar with Neil Young's "lost" album Time Fades Away? I've long heard rumors of it, but just chalked it up to another great experience in this life that I would never have. Then, while visiting my parents on Christmas, it happened: I found the album in mp3 form online. For a slew of reasons, this album has never been released on CD. Young has stated he's disappointed in the album technically and artistically. Sometimes we are our own worst critics. I would ask that you all search out this hidden gem and review it positively in the comments section of this website. Let's boost Neil's self esteem.

Today's Lesson in Gym Etiquette
Please wipe down your machines after you use them. If someone uses it after you do and touches your sweat they can contract HIV.

Today's Cell Phone Accesory
Communication is the building block of any relationship. I'm constantly looking for ways to be more open and sharing with people that I love or people that I want to love. One of these ways that I have found is with my new bluetooth headset (pictured here).

Look real close. Can you see it? This is what I used to have hands free discussion. This is what I will use to get closer to people. You can't fear rejection when it comes through such a small earpiece and you can finally speak your mind when you know it has to travel the course of your tear-streaked cheeks.

Today's Prediction
Using your bluetooth at the gym will become the new faux pas, but I will use it one last time to exclaim, while on a phone call with my therapist, "I just got AIDS!" Snap Fitness will adopt this as their new slogan, which will immediately put them out of business. That's called self destructive behavior, which is also what led to Danny Whitten's death during the Time Fades Away tour. It was a sacrifice the island demanded.


  1. lol! you should've posted a full picture of yourself. i like what i've heard of time fades away. i'm sorry you got aids!!

  2. Haha, I like how you bring it all together at the end.

    I hate Bluetooth headsets though. They make people look crazy and/or robots/fastfood workers.

  3. Thank you for noticing Jake. Maddie I'm sorry you got AIDS too. My bluetooth sucks!

  4. I think that's what Scott calls a 'Herald'. Which has proven effective for decades in sketch comedy. What I love most about Time Fades Away is that the eponymous track is a rockin' piano-riff-driven track that outperforms and predates the Neil Young slandering 'Sweet Home Alabama'. Leonard Skinnard (intentionally mis-spelled) probably snorted pcp, listened to this album over and over again and wrote down their pathetic facsimile with an insult to the original author. Much like my own writing process with Flannery O'Connor short stories.

  5. I've been telling you for years that your Bluetooth sucks and is probably the underlying reason for your AIDS, as you would not be at the gym without it.


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