Good Morning Earth People

By Hot Rod 

Greetings. That is how aliens say 'Good Morning'. Since they don't know all the different countries on Earth they say 'greetings' to cover all the different ways people of Earth say hello. It's like how you're not supposed to say 'Merry Christmas' anymore but in reverse. Also, they hold one of their hands up like an Indian when they say it because Earth people love cowboy & Indian movies. Don't get any ideas, I'm no alien. But I do know what it takes to become one. Why do you think I bought all those Pez Dispensers when I broke into my mom's Ebay account? Well, she didn't believe me either. You'll see. Good morning.

Today's alien is: Creepy

Today's Savior is: The Lord

Today's news is: Interesting

Just kidding! I don't watch the news anymore. I used to watch it when Barack Obama was on, but then they kicked Paula off of American Idol. Instead I've been working on a novel. I'm gonna make it out of the metal scraps that I found by the train-yard. I love to play over by the train-yard because you can smoke tons of cigarettes and drink margarita mix, and sometimes you can find used condoms. Whoa baby, hubba hubba! But seriously kids, you got to wear a raincoat if you get rained on. That was a metaphor. I'm using it for my novel.

Today's raincoat is: Umbrella.

Today's sinus infection is: what the doctor says.

Today's novel is: A Fridge Too Far

Haha! That was a joke, too. A Fridge Too Far isn't a novel yet. I'm still making it out of all that scrap metal. I went to the doctor because I had a pain in my head and the doctor says it's a sinus infection. He doesn't know about the toothpicks I left stuck up my nose last weekend when we ate at T.G.I. Friday's. I had the Jack Daniel's Steak and it made me a little tipsy (plus I had been drinking Margarita mix earlier at the train-yard), and the next thing I know, I got 5 tooth picks stuck all the way up my nostrils. Mom told me the last time this happened that she'd take away my Pantera "Cowboys from Hell" DVD if I did it again. So now I got a sinus infection.

Today's medicine is: Amoxicillin

Today's X-Box is: racing game.

Today's prediction is: the future.

I Hope you all had a good morning. I know I did. Remember, living in the future is better than living in the past. My mom says that all the time when I ask her where my S.S.I. is.


  1. This was awesome. Thanks Hot Rod!

  2. Haha. I just don't get it but it's entertaining nonetheless.

  3. i laughed so hard at "Today's alien is: Creepy." hot rod, you are one of a kind.

  4. today's raincoat is: umbrella. lol!