One Week In-tertainment (2-20-10)

By Jake 

Amanda Bynes is starring in the new Farrely Bros. movie titled Hall Pass.

Jonathon Winters is rumored for the role of Papa Smurf in The Smurfs. This is going to be one hell of a movie.

Kevin Smith is so fat that an airline threw him off of a plane. Also he can wear the equator as a belt.

Madonna is going to appear on Jerry Seinfeld's new "reality" show The Marriage Ref.

Kevin James is hosting the Kids' Choice Awards. Is that child abuse?

Brittney Spears spent Valentine's Day at McDonalds, although she really just went through the drive-thru.

America's Frankenstein, Heidi Montag, is still going on about her plastic surgery. Somebody shut this bitch up.

Once the Oscars are over we can finally stop hearing about Sandra Bullock. Seriously, who gives a shit about her?

Kevin Eubanks was thought to be leaving the Tonight Show, but in reality he is still going to be on it. Thank the lord!

Courtney Love has finally found a lable for a new Hole album. Finally, a reason to neglect your child!

Megan Fox has declared that she would make a great mother. Usually vapid mutants do.

Tiger Woods apologized to the world for cheating on his wife with 30 women.

7 comments:

  1. if I was Tiger Woods, my speech would be "well bitches, I'm single!!"
    if heidi montag doesn't have plastic surgery to talk about to keep her famous, creepy pratt will divorce her fat ass.
    and finally - i can't believe i'm saying this - where is jennifer aniston?

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  2. Tiger Woods should probably actually apologize for taking so long to get this divorce going, really.

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  3. Yeah, there were no Aniston stories this week at all. I'd report on her and Gerard Butler still being together if it was a story on People.com just to post a picture of her.

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  4. "America's Frankenstein" is the best Heidi Montag nickname I've ever heard. I hope it goes viral.

    Also, there is no way Jonathan Winters is alive. He was at least 60 when his breakout film "Say Yes" came out in 1932.

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  5. that's so weird. i have that same bikini that heidi montag is wearing!

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  6. Haha! This is a really funny OWE!! I have that bikini too!!!

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