Life with Mikey #98

By Jake

Turkeys are one the most ridiculous looking animals on God’s Earth.

Pogosticks are overdue for a comeback.

Gremlins don’t scare me, but Ghoulies do.

Laffy Taffy is just okay, but the jokes can be pretty funny.

I was sad to hear that Michael Jordan died, but glad to find out it wasn’t true.

Carpet is better than rugs.

Window air conditioners are just glorified fans.  Stop wasting your money.

People on heroin can make good music, but I’d never let one watch my kid.

In the 80s people were too interested in other people.

Onion rings are the best thing you can do with an onion.

I am trying to eat less sausage.

Throwing garbage on the street is not classy.

Swiss cheese is good, but not versatile.

If porge is too hot, you can wait about five minutes and it will be “just right.”


  1. Laffy Taffy jokes are not funny. They don't even spell "laugh" correctly on the packaging! There is nothing funny about misspellings. Also, grilled onions are better than ringed onions.

  2. Pogo sticks have started to come back. I saw a bunch of East Asian tourists using them in New York last week and two teenagers killed each other over a pogo stick in Los Angeles this summer.

  3. Are you making a dig at lesbians when you say 'carpet is better than rugs'? Also, you prove that people are still too interested in one another when you say you're glad Michael Jordan isn't dead. Be consistent for once in your miserable life Mikey! Sorry, I'm just a little offended by your turkey comment.

  4. I was sad to hear that Michael Jordan died, but glad to find out it wasn’t true. Hilarious. I am not sure why the previous poster hates lesbians so much. They are people too! Sinners I guess, but aren't we all.

  5. Ditto pwah #MJdead! I felt the same way about Mario Lopez!!


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