Our Take with Sarah and Jake (Andrew "Dice" Clay and Sweet Potato Fries)

By Sarah and Jake

In Our Take with Sarah and Jake, we will be giving our meandering opinions on the most pressing, hot button issues of the day, from politics to religion to The Shield powerbombing Ryback through a table. We're like orange juice: squeezed and full of pulp. 

Andrew “Dice” Clay

Jake:  Andrew Silverstein portrays the character Andrew “Dice” Clay, a homophobic, misogynistic, Brooklyn tough guy obsessed with sex.  Are the things he says deplorable?  Yes, but so are the things the Pat character says in the feature length motion picture “It’s Pat.”  “Dice” is a classic character and the things he says are sometimes funny, sometimes awful.
I have been reading the book “Live From New York,” which is about “Saturday Night Live.”  Nora Dunn famously walked out on the show during the week that Andrew Silverstein hosted as his character Andrew “Dice” Clay.  She was wrong to do this in many ways, but mostly because she is a sketch actor dealing in characters.  Even “Dice” said he thought it was ridiculous since he was just portraying a character and he thought that those actors would “get it.”
I am not a huge fan of Andrew “Dice” Clay, but his presence is strong and he is occasionally very funny.  I am more interested in hearing what Sarah, a third wave feminist and sketch comedy/improv actor, thinks about him.  Let’s find out together:

Sarah:  Yuck. I won’t waste my breath on someone like Andrew Dice Clay. MTV should reinstate the ban they placed on this piece of poopy in 1989. I know he probably gets off on it when women get upset about his comedy, so instead of discussing how terrible this poopy man is, I will instead discuss an improv set I saw recently where the players performed “Andrew Dice Clay Improv” and turned what otherwise is considered by everyone to be disgusting material into something very, very funny. The Dice Clay Players made really, outrageously racist and misogynistic jokes the whole time. The thing about it though? They were making fun of Andrew Dice Clay saying them and not the topics themselves. We, the diverse and intelligent audience, laughed and enjoyed the performance because we all could agree that these jokes were so bad. They were so bad! So bad, they weren’t funny. We were laughing at the fact that someone tried to tell them and be serious about it. What a poopy comedian! What a piece of poop. What. A. Piece. Of. Shit. MTV, please ban him again. Anyone who says "adult nursery rhymes" seriously is just kinda trying too hard.

Sweet Potato Fries

Jake: Until very recently I abhorred the taste of sweet potatoes.  To me, it tasted like a pumpkin’s engorged dick.  Although I do like taste of pumpkins and penis, I found the taste of sweet potatoes off-putting.  Now, if sweet potatoes (or yams) are cooked a certain way I can enjoy them to some degree.
Sweet potato fries are bullshit.  French fries are wonderful.  You do not need to change up the classic formula.  This is a total Coke II situation.  Sweet potato fries are the Crystal Pepsi of burger side dishes.  It’s a novelty that is semi enjoyable, but hard to wrap your head around.

Sarah:  Sweet potato fries are the most delicious trend food to happen to the world since regular ol’ french fries. Good grief. There is a reason they cost a little extra and a reason I willingly pay that extra to eat them. They are so good! I love them. They are sweet and salty. The best food combination in the land! They are so soft on the inside! There is sometime exotic about a vegetable that you don’t eat often being dipped in hot oil and coming out on a sexy platter next to a greasy hamburger or even in a bowl all by themselves. It’s like the straight laced, shy, quiet sweet potato sat around for years doing what it was told until someone was like, “Hey. Sweetie. Do something fun for yourself.” Sweet potato took off her glasses and got crazy and everyone was amazed at how good it tasted! Guys, even frozen sweet potato rounds from Jewel Osco are good. Trust me on this. Yes, they are semi-trendy. Six years ago they were new and fresh and I was totally on board before everyone else -- I don’t care! Now, they are mainstream and I would still go see them in concert.

A pumpkin would be proud to have a sweet potato fry as its penis! And so would I!


  1. totally with Sarah on both of these... guess that makes me our generation's ADC. anyone want some SPF?

  2. ADC is the house comedian of Steubenville High School! Rape with a sweet potato penis is still rape!! These takes on sweet potato fries were the most entertained I've ever been in relation to sweet potatoes including the many times I've ingested their dull-tasting play-dough-esque fried carcass strips!!!


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