Good Morning from OYIT [Feb 23 - post Oscar edition]

By Glenn

Good morning. Those of you on the West Coast usually don't read this when it's posted at 7:00 am CST but you have even MORE of an excuse to put it off today. What a fantastic time you must have had at all the Oscar parties last night. The awards are great, but nothing compares to doing coke in the bathroom with Mickey Rourke or doing coke out in your car with Anne Hathaway. The Oscars come once a year so I hoped you enjoyed yourself last night. For the movie industry and our economy, things are about to get even worse.

[I will do a full Oscar roundup hopefully later today. I watched - AND live tweeted the entire awards show from the comforts of a friend's couch and my blackberry.]

Today's Weather

I know we were just on the West Coast last week but in honor of the Oscars we return once again to see what day will be like in Hollywood. You should have a lovely day sleeping off your Oscar party hangover. Perhaps when you walk down to Starbucks to pick up a latte you can pause and look up to the sky, knowing you are blessed with beautiful weather in February because you live in a blessed place. While of course there are many murders in the greatest Los Angeles area (OJ Simpson's alleged murder of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman being the most famous), with weather like this it's hard to complain. And if you do complain, you can win his entire fortune in a civil trial.

Today's Christian Movie
If you've been reading this so far, you can tell I love talking about the Oscars and movies in general. My favorite movie of all time is the Goonies. It was made when I was a kid and therefore I assume it is the best movie to ever be made, because I watched it when I was 10. But we're not talking about Goonies; it doesn't mention Christ or the covenant between husband and wife even once. The Christian movie of the day is Fire Proof:

FIREPROOF touched the hearts and impacted the marriages of millions of moviegoers. Churches across the country purchased entire show times to help strengthen marriages in their congregations and to reach out to their communities. And those churches reported increased attendance in response!
The jokes pretty much write themselves, but if you'll watch that trailer I think you'll get a good idea of why Fire Proof has spread like a brush fire through strong Christians throughout the United States. Christian women love Kirk Cameron aka Mike Seaver and Christian men love the domination they can find through Christ. Parts of the movie actually look like they have real acting and genuine emotion. If you have a marriage or a struggling marriage, I recommend this Christian film.

Today's Live Event Stream
Much as I live tweeted the Oscars last night, today there will be an event for you to "stream" on your computer. This morning at 10am EST, the Center for American Progress will be hosting a National Clean Energy Project: Building the New Economy forum in DC, and you can watch it at the link I just provided.
The half-day event will bring together a select group of high-level government, business, labor and advocacy group leaders with a focus on developing a plan and key guiding principles to lead the transformation of U.S. energy policy and to reduce the nation’s dependence on foreign oil.
If that doesn't sound fun to you, I'd like to what fun is. On second thought, I just remembered adults don't always do things because they're fun! I don't want to know what fun is; I just want to hear Energy Secretary Steven Chu tell me whether my new job will be spinning wind turbines or burying nuclear waste on abandoned farmland.

Today's Prediction
A massive earthquake will knock down the "H-O-L-L-Y-W-O-O-D" letters from that big hill, but the replacement letters will produce enough energy to for AC Cowling's to drive around several alleged murderers around town for hours without filling up. Also, OJ Simpson will sue the makers of Fire Proof for implying you can only be a good husband by submitting yourself to Christ and not for killing your ex wife and her boyfriend.


  1. i wish i could stay home all day and find out if i could get a new job. unfortunately, i'm off to my crap job. go go green!

  2. I'm not going to read this until I get up tomorrow, but I just wanted it to be known that 1.) I JUST watched the Oscars, they were on like 12 hours after they were on in America; 2.) Tyler called me to tell me that he met a really cool girl that gave him her phone number, Tiffany Green; 3.) And Kaleena, really has to be one of the sweetest people in the world (judging from her diligent comments).

  3. Kaleena's the best.

    Also, Good Morning from OYIT remains the fillet mignon of OYIT's Old Country Buffet. My TV show article is like their shitty potato wedges. Sometimes they're good, but they're usually worse than anything you can get at Taco Bell (Taco Bell being The Onion in this metaphor).