Good Morning from OYIT [Feb. 3]

By Jake

Good morning readers. I asked Glenn if I could write one good morning article this week, and he obliged. I'm not here to stand on a pulpit and preach to you, nay, I merely want wish you a good morning. I want to shower you with well wishes as if they were fragrant roses falling from the heavens above. So tilt your head toward the sky and let the roses tickle your cheeks.

As you can see, there are going to be a lot of H's and L's going on depending where you live. H is for High and L is for Low. If you're going to get high make sure you're nowhere near the 'L's or else you're going to have a harsh comedown. Otherwise toke up, friends.

Instead of coffee, which is bad for your colon, I suggest that today you drink a fruit smoothie. It's a low-fat and low-calorie breakfast. I'd suggest that you have some sort of carbohydrate filled food since it's breakfast and you're going to be active today. Here's a recipe I got from Recipezaar for a strawberry-banana smoothie:

* 250 g strawberries, hulled
* 1 medium banana, peeled and roughly chopped
* 300 ml 1% low-fat milk
* 150 ml natural yoghurt
* 15 ml spoon clear honey

1. Place all the above ingredients into a blender and blend until smooth.
2. Adjust the sweetness according to taste and pour into serving glasses.

What to Wear?
I would suggest something sensible, yet comfortable. We have already decided that you'd be active today, and you don't want to be busting your ass wearing a suit and tie or a short skirt/high heels combo. I would go with something more casual. You might get into a fight today. It's the kind of day where a "take no prisoners" attitude is acceptable. If somebody gets in your way you have my permission to fuck them up.

Today's website of the day is It's a site that keeps track of the music you listen to via a small, lightweight program you download. The more music you listen to the better the recommendations for you will be. For example: if you listen to a lot of ICP you might get a suggestion for Twiztid or Blaze Ya Dead Homie. As a sign of good faith, I will allow you to see my page.

Fun Fact: An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Today's professional wrestling finisher of the day is the Million Dollar Dream. This hold has defeated countless foes of the Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase. Once he has it locked in, there is little hope for escape. Here is a video of DiBiase's protege, Stone Cold Steve Austin, applying the devastating maneuver to Bart Gunn.

Have a good morning, and remember that we love you.


  1. then again, no one can take glory from stone cold

  2. damn! my first comment didn't post - well, anyway, it was a great article. and i just hoped for some 'H's' in the near future.