Good Late Morning From OYIT [3-30]

By Jake

Looks like Good Morning is running late today. I'll go into possible reasons later, but let's not begin with half-baked theories, rather let's kick off with a little discussion on Earth Hour. Earth Hour is the greatest humanitarian effort of 2009. On Saturday, we all turned off our lights for one hour, which saved the Earth and made us all aware of lights. If you weren't live blogging during Earth Hour, then you might as well be a serial killer. You know who didn't live blog during Earth Hour? Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy and Richard Jewel.

Yesterday's weather was pretty shitty. I woke up to about two inches of snow, which melted away over the day. Here's photographic evidence of yesterday's weather:

That's the tree in front of my house and the house across the street. The snow luckily went away, and the weather looks like today:

The Reason This Article was Late Today
Last night Glenn told me he was going to write this article, possibly so he could talk about the Missouri Tigers losing their game over the weekend, and his subsequent bout with depression it caused. He also asked me if I would play Literati with him and his girlfriend-- an invitation I said yes to. Around 9:30 PM we started playing Literati on Yahoo games. This is the only reason I'd ever go to Yahoo because I'm not 45 years old and use Gmail. In fact, I've never had my main email through Yahoo. Fuck Yahoo.

We played Literati until late in the evening, about 1:00 AM, in fact. Glenn won every game we played, I got second twice and last once. The height of Literati came when some mentally ill person came into our table and asked if he could play. Glenn tried to have cyber sex with him, but only ended up virtually fellating him. The guy couldn't spell for shit, which made me curious about his Scrabble playing ability, but he left before we finished and before Glenn finished.

My theory on why the Good Morning article didn't get written is that Glenn died from having blue balls in his sleep, or drowned in his own nocturnal emission. Either way, R.I.P. Glenn.

If he's not dead, hopefully he'll grace us with his presence tomorrow morning. Until then, hang loose and hang ten.


  1. ah, come on glenn don't go dying, now. there's so much more room for your opinions on 'the eagle' - they need someone strong to put them back under their republican/libertarian rocks.

    this 'good morning' article made me LOL, btw.

  2. This is the funniest GM post this week.

    BTW, where is Bub?

  3. Australia. He never answers my emails about posting a GM, and we have a pretty regular schedule now.

  4. I'm bogged down in research now for a few months. But, I plan on coming back (writing regularly like I did before) when I am done. That is, if I am not extraordinarily rendered. I know what has happened to those brave enough to write fish puns. They get krilled without a herring.

  5. We're all gillty of fish puns, but that carp is over used. If I cod, I would do fish puns every week.