Life With Mikey [11-10-09]

By Mikey

When I went to check my email this morning, I found that it was full of messages of people wondering why there was no Life With Mikey yesterday. Well, I forgot! I had a lot of stuff to do this weekend, including going to Menards. Anyway, here is my new article.


I will not be going ice skating this winter no matter what my wife tells you.

I have not climbed a tree in over 20 years.

Why are they making a new Sherlock Holmes movie? They're never going to outdo The Adventure of Sherlock Holmes' Smarter Brother.

I am a huge fan of the Garbage Pail Kids. Their offbeat brand of gross out humor is outrageous and hilarious, but even I won't watch their film.

I'm glad to see Jenna Elfman back on TV where she belongs.

I wish there was a Cheetos flavored Dorito.

The way people made fun of Blossom's nose was unfair. She was very pretty.

Can someone tell me what a blog is? Like, really, what it is.

I took my son to get the swine flu vaccine but now I'm having second thoughts about it.

The best thing about the first snowfall of winter is making snow angels. The worst part is shoveling snow.

A donut is a cake my wife lets me eat for breakfast. Yet she won't let me eat a churro, which is basically a donut! Women!

Ted Danson is one of America's finest actors.

I'm sure glad that I don't have to rake leaves again for a year.

I haven't been punched since 1987.

5 comments:

  1. You shouldn't be eating donuts or churros, Mikey. Eat a piece of fruit.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I haven't been born since 1987.

    ReplyDelete
  3. MIKEY, YOU'RE WRITING THESE COLUMNS ON A BLOG, YOU MORON!

    ReplyDelete
  4. i've never been punched either, no matter how hard i try. and donuts are awesome - stop hatin' on donuts mikey, you ungrateful donut eatin' bastard!

    ReplyDelete

no more comments from spam bots. fuck off.

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