Good Morning Twenty-Somethings

By Glenn 

Good morning. Sorry this GM is late, but I'm a twenty-something. There has been a column in the New York Times recently called What Is It About 20-Somethings? that explains why my generation is full of such lazy, shiftless people. One of my friends turned 20 last night and I went to her party as a celebration of this accomplishment (living 20 years is a long time in some circles!) and as a protest of the Cordoba House/Park51 Islamic center in Manhattan. There were tons of people that age at the party and most of them were very responsible and appreciated my irrational anger towards an Islamic culture center. So maybe the writer of this article needs to spend some more time in REAL AMERICA!

Today's Weather

"It's August, and the heat is rising!" is the kind of headline and lede people read a year ago this month when crazed, teabagging psychos descending on town halls and military funerals to talk about things that weren't real and scream about transgressions that never happened. It's not as hot right now in a literal sense but the battle over whether the 500 story mosque should be built over the remains of Ground Zero rages on. I'd like meteorologists and sociologists to answer the question as to why the stupidest controversies all happen in the summer.

Today's Viral Video

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen, formerly twins and children, are now adults and actually twenty-somethings. When they were children, they made a video about the desire for pizza featured here. Little Caesar's adopted this video as part of their marketing campaign in the early 90's after the Noid was convicted of double murder, but it fell flat. People just weren't willing to try this kind of pizza except for twenty-somethings. You can't make money just selling things to youth culture or we would have shit movies that catered to teens and a culture that glorified being young.

Today's Platitude
I couldn't find any pictures of platitudes, so I put this picture of a kitten saying hang in there. I don't find that phrase such a platitude as I do a well-meaning suggestion that misses the point. If we don't hang together, we will surely hang separately.

Today's Prediction
We'll hit 30 and everything will be fine.


  1. "Should the West help Gorbachev?" Man, I hope things turn out better for 20-somethings than they did for that guy.

  2. I tried to watch that MK&A video but developed epilepsy in the process. Now I'll never be a thirty-something.

  3. When I'm 30 I'm going to kill myself. Who would want to be that fucking old!?

  4. I can't wait to turn 30. Who's ever actually said THAT?

  5. I'm so glad to see that Gimme Pizza finally made it onto OYIT!

  6. today, we are all 20-somethings.


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