Scam Bait - Employment Sweepstakes



By Bub 

From: MICROWORD CORPORATIONS.
Subject: CONGRATULATION!!

Official Winning Notification.

Welcome to Microword Corporation new year promotions, We are pleased to
inform you of the released results of Sweepstakes Promotion organized
by Microword Corporations, in conjunction with the foundation for the
Promotion of software products, 22nd December 2010 Madrid-Spain.

Your email address emerged as one of the on-line Winning emails, in the
1st category and therefore You have been approved for a cash award
500,000.00Euros (Five Hundred Thousand Euros) a total cash prize of Five
Million Euros Shared among the ten International winners in the 1st
category.

To begin your claim, do file for the release of your winning by contacting
our accredited agent:

CONTACT: Dr. ALEJO ENRIQUE
EMAIL: claimsdept_dr.alejo@live.com
Note: This Email Lottery is sponsored by Microword Corporation, and all
the members of Spanish Msft Word Resource Consortium Software Promotion
Companies.

All winnings must be claim not later than 23/02/2011 after this date funds
might be returned back to Microword Resource Madrid, This internet E-mail
draw is held periodically.

And is organized to encourage the use of internet users, And to promote
computer literacy worldwide.

Congratulations!!!

Sincerely,
Mrs. Roselyn Gomez.
Promotions Manager.

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Dear Mrs. Gomez,

Thank you for your email. I know times are tight and it is hard to muster even one congratulation (let alone one Microword). I am excited to take part in your New Year's promotion, and am happy to see that you've teamed up with the foundation for the Promotion of software products. It is refreshing to see a non-profit organization heading up efforts normally reserved for private enterprise. It is also nice to see an alliance between the normally bitter rivals software products, and very small words.

Mrs. Gomez, your unconventional use of capitalization and sentence fragmentation lends to your credibility as a maverick and pioneer in the microword and sweepstake fields of business. I was also reassured by your acknowledgment of the emergence of my email address, which has toiled in relative obscurity since the dark ages of the internet (mid-1990s), and has long deserved an award equal to, or greater than, 500,000 Euros.

But what sold me.

Is the high standard you hold your claims agents to. Prospective claims agents with commensurate work experience but lacking appropriate credentials need not apply. Employment seekers in the industry of agency for claims who thought they would short-cut their way into a position with Microword Corporations by way of a non-accredited claims agent degree earned through correspondence with a Kaplan State University or a Phoenix College Online will be unsuccessful. Only accredited claims agents, such as industry legend Alejo Enrique, will be qualified to distribute internet lottery winnings with the approbation of the renowned Computer Literacy Advocate - Microword Corporations.

Some ask, in light of your dedication to literacy, why make your words so inscrutably tiny? "Precisely." you answer, and award those people half a million Euros. I am one of those people, and I thank you.

In conclusion, I accept your offer for the position of accredited claims agent for the Corporations Microword.

Sincerely,
Alejo Enrique
Accredited Claims Agent
Northwestern Agent Accreditation Bureau for Claims, Stakes and Internet Prizes

3 comments:

  1. Haha! A Bub written Scam Bait is just what I needed to momentarily pull my head out of this noose. Consider this comment my suicide letter.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is what we ALL needed. Bravo.

    ReplyDelete