After I get done fuckin’ cookin’ on Sunday, I head up to the bar on account of not having a license because of a DUI. I gotta wait somewhere for my old lady to pick me up, right? Might as well drink a dozen beers while waiting. Drinkin’ beer is a good way to kill some time.
The problem I have is with this motherfuckin’ poker machine. This motherfucker eats all of my money! I have this system where I put $5 in and play that before putting any money in. I usually don’t lose too much money when I do that, but this motherfucker suckers me in. I get a good hand and I have to bet more to keep playing and raise the bet.
This last weekend I fucking lost more money than I made at work. Shit. I lost one hundred fucking dollars. I only made seventy. There goes my money for weed and cable. How am I supposed to get fucking high and watch wrestling? Fuck that.
I’m not going to that bar any fucking more. This last weekend was the last straw, man. I got to the bar and the bartender told me the dollar machine was cold. Shit, okay man, thanks for the heads up, right? Yeah fuckin' right. I play the penny slots for an hour and lose $100. Then some jackoff comes in, puts $10 in the dollar machine and wins $50. I have never been so pissed off in my life. Fuck that part time assholes.
From now on, I’m going to a different bar--one without a poker machine. Who needs that shit anyway? I’ll get drunk somewhere else, where the bartenders don’t fuck with me.