Overheard at the Mall

By Jake

10. "After this Orange Julius, let's go get some wallet chains from Hot Topic."

9. "Face/Off was way better than Broken Arrow, hands down."

8. "Marsupilami? I'm more of a Bonkers kind of guy."

7. "You sunk my battleship." (Near the Battleship tournament being held at the mall)

6. "That photo booth took my last dollar!" (Yelled at a confused security guard)

5. "I'm going to get my eyebrows threaded and I don't give a shit what my mom says about it."

4. "Sbarro pizza always gives me explosive diarrhea." (said by me)

3. "What store sells those t-shirts with the Looney Toons in baggy clothing?"

2. "That was my last Lik-a-Stick, asshole!"

1. "I only sucked his dick on the school bus once. Whoever told you that was a lying." (said by a 14 year old girl)


  1. Face / Off is definitely better than Broken Arrow. I wonder who was arguing that it wasn't? Probably some asshole at the Battleship Convention.

  2. i love sbarro and this list of things overheard at the mall

  3. I'd like to know how many of these were true.

  4. Sbarro really does give me diarrhea and the eyebrow threading is also true.

  5. 14 year old girls do suck dick on school buses, too. I didn't hear that at the mall, I heard it at a bait shop.