Scam Bait - Tears for Cheers Coalition




By Bub 




From: FROM UN
Subject: WINNING APPROVAL PAYMENT CODE:(511) FROM UN AND WORLD BANK


Our Ref: UN/EU/CITIBANK/511

WORLD BANK GROUP AND UNITED NATION ORGANIZATION do hereby give this irrevocable approval order with Release Code: GNC/3480/02/00 in your favor for your contract entitlement/award winning payment with the UNITED NATION to your nominated bank account. Now you’re new Payment,United nation Approval No;UN5685P,White House Approved No:WH44CV, Reference No.-35460021, Allocation No: 674632 Password No: 339331 , Pin Code No: 55674 and your Certificate of Merit Payment No : 103 , Released Code No: 0763; Immediate Citibank Telex confirmation No: -1114433 ; Secret Code No: XXTN013, Having received these vital payment number , therefore You are qualified now to received and confirm Your payment with the United Nation immediately within the next 72hrs.

As a matter of fact, you are required to Deal and Communicate only with MR ANDREW WOLLEY, DIRECTOR INTERNATIONAL REMMITTANCE CITIBANK OF UNITED KINGDOM, with the help and monitory team from the CITIBANK OF NEW YORK which is our official remitting bank, Committee On Foreign Payment Matters in United Nation, has look up to make sure you receive your fund valued $8.3m. So contact:MR ANDREW WOLLEY on his contact information,Direct Citibank Telephone No +44-7045700247, Cell/mobile +44-7031899725 or cell/mobile +44-Fax Number:870 28 7323, Email:andrewwolley3425@aol.com for immediate release of your contract/inheritance/Award Winning claim Be informed that you are not allowed to correspond with any person or office anymore, You are required to send bellow informati

1) YOUR FULL NAME:
2) FULL ADDRESS OF YOUR CITY,STATE AND COUNTRY:
3) PHONE,FAX AND MOBILE:
4) COMPANY NAME,POSITION AND ADDRESS:
5) BANK INFORMATIONS:
a) BANK NAME:
b) BANK ADRESS:
c) ACCOUNT NUMBER:
d) SWIFT CODE/ ROUTING NUMBER:
6) PROFESSION,AGE AND MARITAL STATUS:
7) A COPY OF YOUR INT'L PASSPORT/DRIVERS LICENSE

NOTE: YOUR PERSONAL CONTACT/COMMUNICATIONCODE WITH CITIBANK IS(511),YOU ARE ARE ADVICE TO SEND YOU FULL BANKING INFORMATION TO THE CITIBANK OF LONDON INTERNATIONAL REMMITTANCE DIRECTOR HEADED BY MR ANDREW WOLLEY AND MAKE SURE YOU SPEAK WITH HIM, WITH YOUR NEW PAYMENT CODE FOR RELEASE OF YOUR PAYMENT AND SEND HIM ALL YOUR BANKING INFORMATION NOW.

CONTACT CODE(511)
OFFICER:MR ANDREW WOLLEY.
POSITION:DIRECTOR,INTL,REMMITTANCE CITIBANK LONDON.
TELEPHONE OFFICE/BANK:+44-7045700247 ,
FAX NUMBER:+44870 28 7323
CELL/MOBILE: +447031899725,
EMAIL:andrewwolley3425@aol.com

SIR FRANK PETERSON.
(CHAIRMAN COMMITTE ON FOREIGN CONTRACT/AWARD WINING PAYMENT UNITED
NATION AND USA GOVERNMENT).

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Dear World Bank Group and United Nation Organization, Mr Andrew Wolley, and Sir Frank Peterson,

I am honored to be named the winner of the UN and World Bank prize. I know there were many other worthy candidates - Mohamed Yunus, Aung San Suu Kyi, Kei$ha; and more controversial candidates - Omar al Bashir, Tony Haywood, Dennis Rader, etc. I am proud to be mentioned along with such renowned/hated names. As part of my work with the Tears for Cheers Coalition I have toiled unrecognized for the greater good and sometimes I wonder if I actually do any good at all. Thanks to this long-deserved reward, I know that any damages or casualties that have resulted from my public service have instantly been subjected to legal immunities, and have been forgotten.

As you are well aware, I serve as the CEO and Board of Directors of the unregistered 401(c)3 not-for-profit organization, Tears for Cheers Coalition (T4CC). I have committed myself to the work of gathering tears of rich westerners to sell as drinking water in remote areas of the third world. Tears, of course, are not as nourishing or hydrating as real water, but in many instances they are tastier. And tears, unlike the Ebola infested well-water they drink in the non-aligned countries, will not kill them because they are all already infected with AIDS.

These literal beggars cannot be choosers. I have in fact reached agreements with the governments of Equatorial Guinea, Guinea, Guinea Bissau, Guinea McCarthy, and the breakaway Nigerian republic of Biafra to criminalize the refusal by beggars of donated tears in exchange for some good or service. We do not ask for much, and are happy to accept even the most modest of sex acts, or meekest of children as payment. The children we receive as payment become upwardly mobile by becoming the first in their family to be gainfully employed - in one of our nine tear factories throughout Africa and Asia. We use these childrens' unclean tears to dilute the pure western tears in order to make our resources last longer and save more lives.

Our methods of tear extraction are among the most humane in the tear extraction business. Unlike our predecessors we have discontinued the use of physical torture devices such as the iron maiden, the spinal tap, and the metallica, in favor of non-physical tear inducing methods. For our third world factories, we translate Morrissey records to the childrens' native tongues and play them on loop as we show them pictures of their family members that have died of dehydration after ingesting tears as a substitute for water. For our western donors, we simply show them video of what transpires in our third world factories.

Once the children reach adulthood they have attained valuable crying skills that will help them cope with whatever soul-crushing forced servitude they choose/are sold into as a career.

As you are aware, the work we do is vital to the lives of millions, if not billions worldwide. Which is why I humbly accept your prize and donate all the proceeds back to T4CC. I choose to accept this offer even under your Draconian stipulation that I will not be allowed to make contact with any person or office anymore. I am willing to make that sacrifice if it means that it will put even one more frown on an underprivileged child's face. Thanks to my generous act we will now be able to hire a team of Quechua and Aymara speaking Morrissey translators in order to reach out to the untapped Amazonian tear market. We will not stop until the day a Zimbabwean boy has the luxury of crying at the death of a pop star, or a Bhutanese girl can weep openly because her mom read the AIM chat transcripts between her and her boyfriend. When that day comes, tears will become universally superfluous, and we will become trillionaires. God bless the crying children of the world.

Tears and Cheers,
Bub

5 comments:

  1. Release Code: GNC/3480/02/00???

    Did they also give you some vitamins and health product?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bub, I always knew you would receive an award one day, but I always assumed it would be for your brilliant OYIT writing or maybe for a three-legged race. Congrats!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Congratulations on the award and thank you for all of your hard work in the field of tears. I'm so proud of you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Seriously, this is one of the best articles I have ever read!

    ReplyDelete

no more comments from spam bots. fuck off.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.