By Sarah and Jake
In Our Take with Sarah and Jake, we will be giving our professional opinions on the most pressing, hot button issues of
the day, from politics to religion to the untimely death of Chris Benoit (RIP). We're
just like the ladies of "The Talk," but with less sex appeal.
There is an amendment in North Carolina right now that makes it
so that the only legal union recognized by the state would be between a
man and a woman, it is called Amendment 1. WWE wrestler CM Punk got
into a little trouble last week for telling a fan to kill himself
because they said that homosexual make them sick. This is a
only true reasons you would oppose gay marriage is because 1) you are
religious 2) it makes you “sick” to think about yourself or others
performing gay acts on each other 3) you are a biggot. The last one
applies to the first two, of course. Living in a “free” country where
homosexuals are not allowed to marry is sort of like attending a Judy
Tenuta concert where she refuses to play her accordion--it is
pay taxes, so why do they not have the same rights as heterosexuals?
Because it is “gross?” I think praying to a God is gross, but I hardly
think religious nuts should not have the same rights as sane people.
Right wing people are stupid and the gay marriage issue is further
proof. Everybody should be equally free in this dumb country, or we
should at least stop saying “it’s a free country” every time we ask
somebody to quit singing on a crowded train.
marriage is beautiful and awesome! Why? Because it’s another
celebration of people in love who want to be bound together by law and
recognized as such. Isn’t it nice when two people fall in love and want
to spend their lives together?! Isn’t that a nice break from all the
terrible other things going on in the world! Weddings are seriously the
best parties because everyone looks fantastic and there’s booze and food
and love and everyone is high on life because there’s this electric
aura of possibility in the air. Maybe that’s a romanticized version of
weddings, but I don’t care! It’s just the dumbest when people are
against gay marriage. It literally makes no sense. LIGHTEN UP.
the argument against gay marriage is that it destroys the sanctity of
marriage, I got news for ya: marriage isn’t that sacred unless you make
it sacred. By that I mean, it’s up to the two married people to make the
marriage sacred. There can be 1 zillion laws decreeing marriage as a
sacred union and forbidding deviation from its rigid rules, but humans
are not perfect. We cheat and steal and lie about it and fall out of
love for no real reason. Marriage is no picnic, but if it was, everyone
should be able to bring a dish and sit on the blanket.
love orange juice! I’m really into it right now. For a long time, I
didn’t care about it. But presently I can’t get enough! It’s refreshing
and the best drink in the morning - especially orange juice with pulp. I
know pulp is a very polarizing thing for humanity, like cilantro and
abortion. But I find it delicious and makes good orange juice great
because then I feel like I’m getting a most natural version of it.
let’s take a moment to appreciate the mimosa. Without orange juice,
this incredibly refreshing and deliciously intoxicating brunch bev could
not exist. It’s served in a fancy glass (aren’t all beverages better
served in a fancy glass?) and makes any ordinary breakfast into an
extraordinary event. Thank you ORANGE JUICE FOR MAKING THIS POSSIBLE!
will drink orange juice for the rest of my life, and hopefully one day
be rich enough to buy the fresh squeezed stuff or have the luxury of
time in the morning to squeeze it fresh myself.
I know people often see me as an anti-orange juice propagandist, and
with fair reason: I am not a huge fan. I do not dislike orange juice,
but rather am more indifferent toward it. Orange juice has a high
acidity content and can, at times, make my stomach feel like it has
gonorrhea. I’m sorry to paint that word picture, but it was necessary
to paint. I do not want to pigeon-holed as anti-orange juice or in
terms of the sexual act.
juice is a very healthy drink. If you have the stomach to handle it,
then why not indulge in the beverage. You can also use it in cooking
some Chinese sauces, which adds a nice citrusy zing to an otherwise
boring dish of bok choy, kale and tofu. I will sometimes purchase a
carton of orange juice, but it lasts too long in our fridge (I live with
my wife, who I am counting as part of the “our” in that statement). It
seems like a waste of money to me, but for you, loyal reader, I insist
that you drink it daily.