One Year in Texas: one year in texas talk

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One Year in Texas Talk 10-13-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk 10-06-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website!

No rights for sinners

Yeah, I was calling in because we have to stop the liberal indoctrination that's going on at college campuses. You know what they're teaching at college? That homosexual marriage is a human rights issue. That's ridiculous. Being gay is a sin. You don't need special rights because you're committing a grotesque sin. Wake up people. They're just homosexuals.

Stop the presses

Now, I don't know if this is true or not, but I saw on the History Channel that aliens may have built the pyramids in ancient Egypt. So why is everybody getting so upset about illegal aliens building our garages? All aliens are alike and nobody is going around complaining about the pyramids, at least not that I have heard.

Gas, Grass or...Mass!?

I have a problem with local teens sticking forks in my lawn at night. When I wake up the next day there are about 100 plastic forks sticking in my lawn and overnight they froze there and are really hard to pull out. I don't know where they got this idea, but it is reprehensible. I work hard on my lawn, I mow it about every 9 or so days. I think we need to send these kids to church and let the lord work them over. Maybe then they would have some respect for other people's property.

Don't put this on the Computer

I see the university has hired a bunch of Asian faculty and Hispanics. I wonder how many of those can speak good English. How many times do students have to deal with teachers that can’t speak English? I’ve had the wonderful experience of having to deal with a doctor at the med center who had to repeat everything he said twice just so I could understand a single word he said. We should not have people working here who do not speak good English. And don’t put this on the computer. Put it in the paper.

Chapter and Verse

Regarding the caller who suggested Barack Obama is not baptized, I call his attention to Page 208 of ‘The Audacity of Hope’ in the chapter titled ‘Faith,’ in which Obama describes being baptized at Trinity United Church of Christ in Chicago. He wrote ‘I felt God’s spirit beckoning me. I submitted myself to his will and dedicated myself to discovering his truth.

Rebel yell

I think I am finally starting to figure out President Obama. Since he has a ax to grind with America and America’s past, the reason he won’t help any of the Southern states with the immigration problem is because they were rebels during the Civil War. He is not going to help anyone whom he sees was against his African-American side.

With child

I work with this girl who at one time was a real go-getter. Now she can’t push a broom to sweep the floor and cannot lift anything. Why? Because she is pregnant. In my opinion, if you can’t push a broom to sweep the floor, then you should be on bed rest. If you can’t lift anything, stop lifting the cigarettes to your mouth.

The Bible says

There’s a danger with the government controlling our health care as well as our pensions. In Revelations, it says unless you belong to a certain persuasion, you will not be allowed to compete in commerce. In other words, you will do what you’re told, or you will not trade or eat or be taken care of. Once the government has the ability to sway your votes, you’ll be compelled to do what they say.

America's Chickens are coming home to roost!

AMERICANS claim to be serious about education. However, when a suggestion is made to extend the school year to equal that of other advanced nations in the world, the public will come up with every excuse in the book not to do so. To me, this illustrates that the children rule the roost.

The Needle and the Damage Done...by texting and cell phones?

Today we were going to a meeting and we were going east on Mitchell Avenue. Right on 26th Street, I just happened to look out the window as a passenger and there, laying very plainly on the grass, was somebody’s used needle. That was absolutely the stupidest thing that people could do. But they are drug people, so that’s why they don’t have any brains. Children could pick that up and get germs from it. And if you have HIV, you can give it to those kids because they’d play with the needle. That is absolutely ludicrous. Texting is a problem, yes, but the cell phones are worse. If you can’t walk and chew bubble gum, how do you expect to drive a car and talk?

One Year In Texas Talk 9-29-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website!

You know what else is hard work? Grammar.

We have thugs and thieves in this town that work harder at trying to steal something than they would if they was working on a job.

Hitler thought the same thing about his youth

I was sitting outside Rock Bridge High School the other day to pick up my child after school, and I noticed the horrible, horrible clothes that these kids are wearing. Boys with pants down below their butt so all you can see is their underwear. This is absolutely outrageous. Girls with Daisy Dukes — on high school kids. Then I was watching this show over the weekend about Katrina and how the schools have improved and come back and these kids are wearing uniforms, and they looked great. They were well mannered, there wasn’t anybody going around holding their crotch while their butt sticks out. There’s no hot pants, no cleavage. I think they should do that more, especially in communities like adverse communities like this where it’s such a big deal of what you wear, how you look. … I would be glad to put a uniform on my child, and she said she would wear one

Free food for kids = socialist indoctrination

Some interesting information in the paper's Back to School 2010 section. First, 42 percent of all the 8,380 kids in my town’s 19 public elementary schools receive free or reduced-expense meals. Of course, a quick, easy and politically correct culprit would be to blame the economy, but what about irresponsible parents who expect society to fund their poor choices? Unfortunately, this entitlement attitude carries right on through childhood and into the adult’s life. It seems as if these irresponsible parents can afford a color TV, cable, a cell phone, cigarettes, a few tattoos and a fine car, they ought to be spending the money to feed their kids instead.

FREE STRIPPERS? WHERE?

The giant XXX signs along the highway have flushed out not only the strippers but the hypocrites. As long as the strippers kept it low-key, they would have been all right in Columbia and all around, including the whorehouses. Once the whorehouses got online and the strippers got their big X’s along the highway, then the religious people had to get out and ban their activities. Well, I’m all in favor. I think we can do without strippers. There’s plenty of people who will strip for free.

Be tolerant to everyone, especially the victims of this post

One of the things that make most people the sickest about the Obama administration is he always asks everybody to be tolerant of all the criminals, crooks, welfare people, all those people all around the world. He never wants anybody to be tolerant about the 9/11 victims, the people who lost their lives or their loved ones in the 9/11 attacks. We’ve got to be tolerant of everybody else, but we can’t be tolerant of the people that actually get hurt in these things.

Missed connections

I’m trying to get hold of a lady who has a stock car on her land in a holler, and she called me to have my boys come out and see about it, but I have lost her telephone number and her name. I was wondering if maybe she could give me another call. I haven’t forgotten it; I just lost everything. We drove out past there, but I wasn’t sure.

Yes, it really takes you back...

I don’t have a big fancy education, but I’m smart enough to count money. When city planners spend $15 million for a parking garage but think about laying off firefighters, that takes you back to kindergarten or first grade. Even they would be smarter than that.

Birthers are probably geographically challenged

Those gosh darn right-wingers have it all wrong. No way is President Obama Kenyan. He has to be Egyptian because he’s always in denial.

But someone convinced you that he was

I’m college-educated and retired from the United States Navy. No one will ever convince me that Hussein Obama is not a Muslim. I’ll never believe that he has a legitimate birth certificate. This Marxist will never be my president

Cue The Boss

Your high school glory days of being placed on a pedestal and paraded around because of your name alone are over. Grow up and get a life

One Year In Texas Talk 8-26-10

By Nate

The answer to world peace is smiling kids pictures

Yes, I wanted to call about the little kid's pictures in the paper. There are people who have called in to my paper saying they do not like the kid's pictures. I think having those pictures is great, I hope they continue to print the pictures of the little kids. With all the things that are wrong with the world today, I think that everybody should be happy to see little kid's pictures in their newspaper. So keep the little kid's pictures in the paper. Thank you.

Everybody wants on the No Call List, but not the No Fly List.

I am so glad this primary election is over with. I got so disgusted with phone calls from all the politicians callings. I am on a "No Call" list. Why are politicians allowed to call? Keep putting children's pictures in the newspaper. What better could be in our newspaper than those smiling children? Thank you.

This is America; print the Koran in English!"

Is the inclusion of the mosque across the street from where 9/11 occurred Freedom of Religion in America, or is it the subjugation by another religion of American principles? Sharia Law, footwashers, prayer rugs, separate gym facilities for female and male Muslim students. The list goes on here in America, and Muslims have been at least 120 years, in their words, why haven't we heard about all of these problems they are having within society now or before? Sadly, I truthfully, I believe it is subjugation of their will which is their actual plan. Get an English Koran and find out for yourself. You will be surprised, terribly surprised.

What's Love got to do with it?

With the ruling of the California court, striking down the rights of heterosexual couples to marry one man, one woman, it is now time for those marrying multiple has happened a lot in Utah and all of these other organizations like NAMBLA and everybody else to rush forward and make sure that their deviant lifestyles are protected under the law, just opened the floodgate of the gravity and make sure that everyone can sleep with elephants, dogs, wolves, lambs, and Mongrelize marriage because as the gays and lesbians are not truthful about their reasons for wanting to marry, it is nothing about equality, it is about power and money for corporations, insurance companies, and yes, even the federal government and Social Security Administration, to pay out huge insurance claims, moneys for spousal rights under Social Security. It has nothing to do about love or society's need for two different parents raising children, but then again, who says you have to be truthful when it comes to marriage?

Put me behind the gun!

As a past American veteran, I will say this. I will make it short. That PFC that gave away all of those classified documents should be put up against the wall and shot. As least his death wold be quicker than those put under the gun - his brothers, civilians - people such as that who work honorably with America, so yes, put me behind the gun, I will put him out of his misery faster and more humanely than he will be doing to his brothers in arms, and yes, I believe that anyone else found doing the leaks, including the Wikileaks person needs to be put up against the wall as an example so it will never, never happen again. They forget we are at war and they should go back and use the war powers act to kill a few of these lying, thieving brothers.

Welcome to Obama's childless America

Yeah, I was wondering what we're gonna do about the population in this country. It's getting out of control. How are we gonna keep paying for all these government handouts as the country gets bigger? We don't have room. We don'at have the resources. And China and India are gonna take us over by sheer numbers! If we can't maintain our population, then we can't defeat them. We need to get this country down to 1950's levels. Kick out all the immigrants. Kick out all the welfare babies and anchor babies. If you can;t care for them yourself, they're out. We need to kick out all the Mormons and their multiple wives and multiple children practices. When is it going to stop, people?

One Year In Texas Talk 8-11-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk 7-28-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website!

Hot dog!

I have a question, I guess. In this heat, they provide places like the armory and the mall, and places that you can go to keep cool. Is there anywhere you can go and take your dog or your cat to keep cool? If there is, I’d sure like to know about it. Because in this heat my dog is panting, panting, panting.

Stop loafing and get a job

While many find the Republicans reluctant to extend unemployment benefits any longer than what they have been extended and extended, having seen just the examples of my two stepsons, both in their mid 30s, that would rather sit back on the state dole unemployment welfare than actually go out and get a job and support their families, it truly makes one wonder if candidate Angle of Nevada doesn't have it right where many Americans become spoiled of entitlement of unemployment and the extended vacation it gives them at the government's expense. Now mind you we live here in Southeast Missouri where costs are relatively small, but across this country, unemployment can be a pretty good living. The jobs that were created by the stimulus were government jobs, police, teachers, union employees, as I say, government. Where are the private sector jobs? Not because nobody wants to do it because of impending tax increases with health care and the like. Any time there are taxes on business, you don't make jobs, you kill jobs. What a fine way to buy the votes than in extending the unemployment. I say, get a job.

Attention all Nimrods

Yeah, this is to any Nimrod who doesn’t understand why we celebrate the Fourth of July. Maybe they ought to read the Constitution and the Bill of Rights and understand how independent we are and our ability to be able to print the crap in the paper that they wanted to. Anyway, wake up, Nimrod, it’s a free country. Enjoy it. We fought for it many years, many times.

Wait, the Farmer's Almanac predicted when school would start?

Well it’s obviously going to be a hot end of summer this year. Even the Farmer’s Almanac predicted it. What was the reason that we started school two weeks early? It must have been something really important because I don’t think anyone can remember. Was it because of test scores? How many hot days are we going to get this year?

Punish the wonderful employers

How many in the Heartland have been paying attention to the advertisements on television, particularly when it comes to the union construction ad that is running on television? Well, could that be that unions are fighting back against the recent incident at Fredericktown where those undocumented were caught at work sites taking jobs away from those journeymen union workers and preventing them their due? Now, I am not `00 percent against unions, but some do not act in a fashion commensurate with their charter, some through trying to get passing such laws by, by golly, you are in the union by the fact that you have a time card at the business and you are going to pay those union dues whether you want to or not. Americans, we are being sent down a path of Marxism. Unionism is at an all time high. We struggle with the invasions from the south, of poverty, drugs and crime that our government the only thing they can do is put up signs that say, "don't go here," and yet we have employers who will dump a journeyman employee at every chance just to put a few more dollars in their pockets and hire the undocumented. Until we start punishing the employers of the undocumented, we will be flipping hamburgers at our nearest fast food place for our children until they get done paying off this wonderful debt our wonderful government has put forth for them. Just a thought, America.

Guide To Summer tip: undressing to eat doesn't beat the heat

We own a restaurant, and a table of three came in, and one of the gentlemen was really sweaty. He came in, sat down, pulled his shirt off his back and draped it over the back of the chair as he was sitting down. This is the kind of stuff you see from the general public all the time. People, when you go out to eat, remember, well if at least it’s not an Olive Garden or some franchise like that, if it’s a family-owned restaurant, it’s like their house. Would you do that in somebody’s house? Also, please remember your manners; ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ go a long, long way. The general public is getting so piggish it’s amazing. Thank you. I love OYIT Talk.

Cue Bob Dylan, "Everything is Broken"

To President Obama and the 535 voting members of the Legislature: it is now official; you are all corrupt morons. The US Postal Service was established in 1775. You have had 234 years to get it right and it is broke. Social Security was established in 1935. You have had 74 years to get it right and it is broke. Fannie Mae was established in 1938. You have had 71 years to get it right and it is broke. War on Poverty started in 1964. You have had 45 years to get it right. One trillion dollars of our money is confiscated each year and transfered to the poor and they only want more. Medicare and Medicaid were established in 1965. You have had 44 years to get it right and they are broke. Freddie Mac was established in 1970. You have had 39 years to get it right and it is broke. The Department of Energy was created in 1977 to lessen our dependence on foreign oil. It has ballooned to 16,000 employees with a budget of $24 billion a year and we import more oil than ever before. You had 32 years to get it right and it is an abysmal failure. You have failed in every government service you have shoved down our throats while overspending our tax dollars. And you want Americans to believe you can be trusted with a government-run health care system?

One Year In Texas Talk 7-21-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website!

Keep eyes on the road

This is in regard to June 23rd post about texting. What an idiot you are is exactly what I am trying to tell you. Keep your eyes on the road and pay attention. Don't be texting when you are driving. I don't care if you wear your seatbelt or smoke in your car. That's your business. When you text and drive, it is my business because people can't do the more of the same thing at one time, it seems like. I don't really care if you talk on your phone, but I don't really think you ought to because you are not paying attention to what you;re doing on the road anyway. I think you ought to stop texting and learn how to drive and then you can keep your nose in your own business also instead of almost running over people.

Doing the right thing, vote out the burgers

While out President stands beholden to the labor unions that are preventing foreign countries from bringing in the skimming equipment necessary to help clean up the disaster in the Gulf, one has to ask themselves, just how beholden should a president be to labor union when it stops him from doing the right thing for the American people instead of driving an agenda, which for 50 percent of his speech this evening, that is all he was trying to do. He is truly following his advisors in the White House which is "Let no disaster go unused." My goodness gracious, America is going to suffer financially from the lack of oil with a 6 months shut down from 20 percent of our oil. Figure what that is going to do to the price of fuel here in America, just before winter. Yeah, he is a wonderful person when he can't bring in the equipment necessary to clean up the mess, that he, in my book, is making by doing so, Yes, people, we have a chance to clean up this mess and it is going to happen this November when we vote these burgers out.

Freedom costs... a Jeep Cherokee Sport

Surprise, surprise, June 17, 2010, a new PEW report shows little change in the Muslim world's view of the United States. Anybody surprised? Your children are going to have a better life than you had. They, the Muslims, have black gold and you have freedom because you have a Jeep Cherokee Sport. Yes, Jeep Cherokee Sports bring you freedom. Thank you.

Don't trust life to strangers

Well, it happened again yesterday, right in front of the American Furniture Store, another idiot trusted their life to total strangers and the lives of their loved ones. You cannot pull all the traffic lanes out of the American Furniture Stores driveway and then pull across and go south on the highway when there is traffic moving. I don't care whether the big truck stopped for you and waved you across. Guess what? After you got hit when you pulled out, that truck just took off. They didn't stay and fill out the police report ans say, oh, "I feel so bad. I waved you on." Do not trust your lives to total strangers, who by the way has a truck higher than the little black car that hit you. They couldn't see that car. It was in their blind spot, too. The main thing is, the light had turned green. All traffic on the highway should have been going forward, but oh, no, somebody felt sorry for you, and now, who is feeling sorry for who? You have two wrecked vehicles. I am sure your insurance company is screaming, and now you have a ticket, I am positive. Please, do not ever, ever again pull across moving traffic lanes like that. You have no place to go that is so important that it is worth the lives of your family, the personal destruction of property, and what if the person who hit you was killed? Where did you have to go that was worth another human's life? I doubt that you can answer that question. Thank you.

D-I-V-O-R-C-E: I don't owe her nothing

Me and my wife are getting a divorce and I am wanting to let everybody know that I don't owe no bills to her and I don't owe anything to her and I wish she would hurry up and start what she needs to do and I want to put this in the news sometime this week if I can and I don't owe her nothing and I am wanting the divorce.

One Year in Texas Talk 6-30-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk 6-23-10

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website!

Vuvuzelas need to buzz off!

Hi, yeah, Texas Talk? I'm concerned about the vuvuzela things that them African people are blowing during the world cup. Now this aint about what you think. Sure they're a bother, but that's not my complaint. If you were a St. Louis Cardinal's fan during the 2005 National Championship when they played the Houston Astros you already know how annoying the bee buzzing sound can be. No, I'm more concerned about bee swarm awareness and readiness. See, I'm a bee farmer. Now when I hear a swarm of bees coming at me -- first I thank God that the bees are coming back and not disappearing -- then I run for the nearest bee suit. I know what an angry swarm of bees sound like! But after this world cup, what if a swarm of angry bees attacks a kid's league soccer game? All them soccer moms are going to look around excited to see what cheer squad soccer mom brought a mess vuvuzelas for their team only to watch in terror as her son or daughter's team and the people in the stands are attacked by bees! We need to ban these things pronto!

Does this answer your question?

Hey, d'y'all print cuss words? If'n ya do, then FUCK! hehehehehehe

Listen up, machos: stop running over turtles!

I know that I should not be the only person who is sick and tired of seeing dead turtles on the highways where these machos think they have to run over them. First of all, the turtles pull themselves back into their shells as soon as the road vibrates and there is nothing slower than something that stops, yet you still have to run over them. If this makes you feel macho, I fell sorry how your life must be. This is pathetic. It is a poor, defenseless creature. Do you know how long it takes to get to the size of one that you are killing? And I know I am not the only one, and yes, this really aggravates me. This is plain inhuman. Thank you.

No, that was Ralph Nader, and I think you actually want anarchy.

Yes, this in reference to Stop Texting and Driving. How in the world do they know that I am texting if they are paying attention to their own driving? That is the scary part. How about you pay attention to what you are doing and not what someone else is doing, and you want to talk about people talking on cell phones, you are probably one who wanted them to make us wear seat belts. Now because of you, we have to wear seat belts. And you probably will want me to stop smoking in my car next. I think we live in a democracy, not an anarchy, so get your nose out of everybody's business, keep your eyes on the road, and pay attention to what you are doing and not what someone else is doing. Thank you. Also, I will be texting when I want to.

Is that last sentence a racial slur or a death threat?

The disaster in the Gulf is bad enough with just the oil leak, but now that BP and our government has decided to burn the oil, it is sad enough with the leak, now they intend to pollute the atmosphere and spread the disaster in a global fashion. What are these idiots thinking? The atmosphere circulates the whole globe. That has been proven when sand from the Sierra and dust from China coming to America, South America, Canada, you see where I am going with this. What kind of rank amateurs are deciding what to do in the Gulf? Plug the leak and get somebody down there that knows how to clean the mess up. President Obama, you are just as burned as that post hole is going to be.

One Year In Texas Talk 6-16-10

By Nate

Link to the story.

Everybody's Barking At Me

Last week there was an advice letter from Cocolalla, Idaho, in The Mailbox of my paper, and the young lady was talking about the dogs barking in her neighborhood. I’m not sure I don’t live in her neighborhood, actually. I can’t step out on my own deck without having dogs on three sides barking at me. I’ve tried to convince them I’ve lived here since before they were born, but they don’t seem to get the message. Anyway, just wanted to comment that we do seem to have an awful lot of barking dogs in this town, and I don’t think putting shock collars on the dogs is going to do it — probably need shock collars on the people who own them.

Putting Their Faith in God and Obama

I feel like, with all the indifference going on in this world right now, there is somebody who truly loves America, and that is Barack Obama. And I, in turn, love Barack Obama. And I believe he inherited chaos to begin with. It’s not his fault. And the people who fault him are ignorant people, and I pray God’s angels would be around him to protect him and his family forevermore.

Please Don't Stop Saying It

I said it once, and I’ll say it again: Calling Margot Fonteyn a dancer is like calling Julia Child a cook. Margot Fonteyn was a prima ballerina renowned all over the world.

A 21st Century Tar-and-Feathering

I’m beginning to think if we would take all the people responsible for the spill and sit them in the oil, all covered from head to toe, maybe cleanup would happen a bit faster.

Vasectomies are like abortions because...?

I saw a letter in the paper from someone who was very much in favor of requiring that women requesting an abortion receive extensive information regarding the fetus and the procedure they were about to undertake. I’ll support that when our legislature passes a law that before a vasectomy is undertaken, the person undergoing the vasectomy has to watch a six-hour movie about the imaginary lives of all the children they won’t be able to create.

If Obama is Michael Jackson, that makes Bobby Jindal ______?

On May 11 Gov. Jindal of Louisiana called the federal government and the White House trying to get permission to build berms to protect the sensitive marshlands in Louisiana. It’s been more than three weeks, and the federal government and Obama administration haven’t done anything to issue all those permits. They’ve only gotten six approved of the 24 they applied for. If they’re trying to do everything possible to stop this catastrophe, they would allow Gov. Jindal to build those berms to protect those sensitive wildlife areas. Instead, all they do is go down there for photo opportunities, leave and go back up to Washington and party like it’s 1999.

This is turning into a whale of a debate!

Yeah, hi Texas Talk. Listen, do you think you could set me up with the person who called in about salting the great lakes? I own a salt company up-start out here in Utah and I'd be more than happy to get that contract. Thank you.
[OYIT cannot set you up because this is an anonymous line. We don't even have a caller ID log.]

Stop torturing him with your ignorance!

Why do people keep calling-in about this whale idea in Michigan? Did everyone forget their Bio 101 class in high school? Has no one been to a pet store and tried to buy saltwater fish for a freshwater tank? Didn't they stop you? Or heck, even go to an aquarium or zoo! You'll notice that they have salt and fresh water fish tanks! This is not hard to understand, people. Salting the Great Lakes has consequences! To use a quote from pop culture, "this ain't Sea World. This is as real as it gets!"

One Year In Texas Talk 6-09-10

By Nate

Another History Lesson

I think we ought to learn our lesson back in the Revolutionary War, when we fought those stinkin’, dirty British. Maybe we wouldn’t have British Petroleum spreading the biggest oil slick in the world. And we Americans should get it through our head that that’s the reason all the Muslims hate Americans — because those stinkin’ Brits over there steal everything they can get their hands on. And if there is a tea party, I damn sure don’t belong to it.

A "Colorblind" Racist?

I’m Irish. My relatives came here from Ireland in the 1800s. The only natives here are the Indians. Everybody else has an immigrant family, but we’re legal. That’s the complaint here. It’s not that they’re Mexican or Iranian or Japanese or any other race. It’s people coming here illegally. Why does that have to be spelled out like people are second-graders? These people should go through the right channels and get their papers.

Mother of All Conspiracies

Hello, Texas Talk? Yeah, I was thinking the other day when I was at the capitol building with my local group of Tea Partiers from Charleston, South Carolina, uh, you might remember the city where the first shot of the Civil War was fired at Fort Sumpter? Yeah, we'll do it again. Anyway, we was there protesting the government take over of our Medicare and Veterans' Hospitals and our Kenyan-born president when it hit me like a buckin' burrow: BP put Obama into office so they could blow up their oil rig and get away with it. Think about it. Kenya was under British control when Obama was born there. BP used to be called British Petroleum. The Brits kidnapped this Obama kid, took him to Hawaii and printed those birth announcements. They made sure he went to them Ivy League schools. How else could a poor, black kid get into those schools? Obama is the Welsh Candidate, if you've heard of that commie movie. I prefer Frank Sinatra to Denzel Washington myself, but the remake with that character as a black only makes more sense now. Don't you see? Orly Taitz is only scratching the surface. We shouldn't be worried about a Chinese flag waving over the USA. We need to worry about the Union Jack!

This photo arrived in our mailbag about the same time we received his call. He must have sent it in.

By Nate

One Year In Texas Talk is an answering machine we have set up to our OYIT hotline. Please call in and leave an anonymous message. If we deem it worthy, it will show up in this weekly piece. Tell us what's on your mind. It doesn't even have to pertain to the website!

A gentleman takes off his hat

I'm a 99 year old lady. I'm writing about the fellow who thinks it's all right to wear his hat to eat. Where is his respect for his other people at the table? A gentleman takes off his hat. Thank you. A reader.

They are good men

Yes, I would like to say thank you for bring smiles back to the website today. And also I would like to say happy wedding anniversary for two young people who were in the paper awhile back. They are dear people, Paul and his wife, and I would say this, he and a Mr. Adolf Oldrich are the only Republicans I ever voted for. They were good men. Every politician should be as honest and faithful as those two were, and I voted for them, but I am a born Democrat. Thanks and happy smiles on the website!

Calling out the Muslims

Well, the feathers or something hit the fan and the subject is Islam. Number 1, something Rev. Franklin Graham said months ago, and number 2, something on South Park about a picture of Mohammed. Fox TV Hannity featured this subject last week. His two panelists were Juan Williams and a woman who wrote the book entitled, They Must Be Stopped. Is the Rev. Franklin Graham the only one who is willing to call out the Muslims? Yet he is known to later soften what he said.

Who is going to call out the Muslims on loyalty to this country? Who called out the Ft. Hood shooter? Hannity's Fox news tackled some of it last evening with Juan WIlliams and the woman who wrote the above book. Mr. Williams said that Franklin Graham's statement made things worse for the troops. I usually side with Mr. Williams on his positions, but here I think he is dead wrong. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is going to make things worse than they already are. If you are dead, can anything worse happen to you? Well, perhaps having your head cut offafter you are dead by a Muslim, Jihad's further humiliation and you are promised a beheading if you insult Islam. Are you going to call out the clerics of Islam for their very public threats? How about bombarding this website with objections to the Muslim clerics getting a pass for this wild verbal flailing? Thank you.

Neighborhood is watching

Yeah, this is about the boy in the gold car, driving about 30 miles an hour down 312 Tuesday during the day and threw four little kittens out of the window. You got stopped and made to pick them up. We got your license number and called the police on it. You ar egoing to get a ticket. I hope you get more than for what you did to those little kittens. You deserve a lot more yourself. You need to be thrown out the window, there are about 20 people down in this trailer court who watches people like you. People dump them all the time. We take everybody's license plate numbers down here and we call the police on you.

This is no crank, son. You know you got stopped today and you will be getting a ticket any time now for doing it. I hope you go to jail. So all of you people who drop these cats and little kittens and stuff and dogs, on the highway, people are watching, especially down here on 312. Every neighbor down here watches for just like you and we take license plates down and we do report them. Thank you, Texas Talk, for the time.

Whales will bring economic relief to Michigan

Last week I was seeing the economic troubles in Michigan with the houses for sale for $100 and the car industry troubles. Well, I figured out how to bring it all back to the way it was in the 1950s, the prime of America in Michigan. The state and their Canadian governor need tourism money, and they need to do it with whales. Michigan is surrounded by water, so the whales will help them all over. Just put the whales in all the Great Lakes, then people will come to pay and see them on a boat. It's that easy. Of course, the state will also have to put salt in all the lakes to make it livable for the whales, but the costs will pay off in the long run especially if they can get a sponsor for the salt like Morton's or Saltine Crackers or something. You read it here first, Michigan. This is it. You're welcome.

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